meditate daily

It didn’t work to re-add this though, not sure why…in any case I already do this. But would love to do it with more intention and with support. What I need to do start doing again is twice a day, it’s been hard this month, since my sleep schedule has been so chaotic.

Winter begins Nov. 8th, so that wuld be a good start day for some too. (Winter Solstice is considered the height of winter, not the beginning). Next lunar month is Oct. 22nd.

off my list. Been doing it consistently for months now, and before that, fairly consistently for about 3 years. If it feels like I’m going to skip a day, I decide to do at least 5 minutes, and if I can do 5, then I can certainly do 15 . . .

I hope to revisit this goal as an observer, it’s always a great source of thought-provoking and intriguing comments.

was amazing. I was off my inhalers by the second day, and active: hiking and canoeing for the first time in a decade after the fourth day. Of course, I was achey and hobbling the second and third days. We did tai ji from 7am to 10 pm, with breaks for meals and sleeping, and one 3 hour break in the afternoon.

I’ve been meditating everyday since, about an hour, except for yesterday, when my neighbors had a medical emergency and we watched their autistic kids that evening. I was so exhausted, just collapsed.

I was hoping to do more qi gong and meditation, at least 2 hours a day, maybe an hour in the morning and an hour in the evening. But I’m still having trouble going to bed at a decent time, so I can wake up. This should be easier after doing it for a week, but I got discombabulated witht the flight. Ans kids seemed happy and none the worse for wear, maybe the youngest was a little more sensitive about things. But I called and sent postcards everyday. And I still feel so connected, but I can sense that outer layer there too, that overly-involved and overly-invested layer. Oh well.

I’m going to a week long Tai Chi/ Qi Gong Taoist retreat next week. A little terrified, because I’ve never been away from my kids that long. But also so excited about the prospect of living and breathing, eating, and sleeping qi gong for a whole week.

At my last weekend retreat I remember thinking that I needed a few more days to really make a shift again: physically, emotionally and spiritually. I hope my expectations aren’t too high.

One thing that my qi gong master said a while ago, (funny thing is he doesn’t remember saying it, but it made such an impression on me): that if we’re not perfect: if our mind wanders, if we don’t practice everyday, not to beat yourself up, after all you’re not Buddha (or insert other enlightened human or boddhisattva of your choice here), that’s why it’s called practice, that’s why we need to do it. The other thing he said is that meditation is more important than sleep, and sure enough it’s the one thing that if I push myself to do, then it always ends up being more invigorating, and nourishing than those extra 20 minutes of sleep. Unless I’m so tired I’m narcoleptic.;-)

Picture is Master Wu, I’ve been studying with him for the last 3.5 years. (Started Qi Gong a couple of years before that.
His website: http://www.masterwu.net/index.htm

I think my main problem is the time I have slotted for it: before bed. Which means it’s dependant on me not getting exhausted and collapsing. I realize I need to make this enough of a commitment to make time during the day. How much time can I ask for? Maybe 15 minutes a day? But then I need time to shower (doesn’t get done everyday since kids), exercise (haven’t done this in a couple of days either), never mind read, draw or practice guitar.

Although, as my house gets unpacked, decluttered organized and my lifestyle gets organized (with the help of http://www.flylady.net) it’s been easier to get more done. But I didn’t heed her advice (or my own as a health practitioner) to pace, I just wanted to get it all done, guess that’s when I collapsed. Pacing, baby steps. For now, getting 15 minutes-30 a day to meditate, another 30 to exercise, I think that’s do-able, prioritze. Showers (maybe 5 min a day) and other self edification will have to wait until I get more organized.

I say it’s accomplished. There are still days when I really have to push myself, and I keep postponing it. I guess there will always be those moments, I was hoping they’d be less frequent though. I was hoping to repeat the aha! moment of the first time I started daily meditation (lasted a year before my discipline waned): the thrill, the peace, the health and energy I seemed to be able to harvest from the practice, but now it’s all more subtle and quiet.

I know it’s as it should be, quotidienne, I know it’s an important lesson, what’s the important platitude here? “Before enlightenment, chop wood and carry water; after enlightenment, chop wood and carry water.” Not that I consider myself enlightened, but it just seemed like the pertinent lesson that I’m not quite picking up.

Maybe another week.

But I try only to skip one day at time, in terms of doing a long complicated form, still gentle and mild though. ANd if I can’t I do a 5 minute visualization.

Small steps.

I’m doing qi gong and sitting meditation every night before going to bed. ANd that’s mostly before midnight, at least before 1am.

that I’ve been practicing Qi Gong every night, followed by sitting meditation. A few months now that I’ve been doing it at least every other day. On the days I skip, I try to do at least a quick visualization (45 breaths) before going to bed.

I already notice a difference in how I’m more tolerant, little things not bothering me. My energy is a little better, my outlook a ton better. Being in pain is not depressing me anymore.