meet interesting people

i dont know if that is the exact title of the goal… but it definitely has learning and dance in its title. you figure it out.

so i am on a mad streak again. i have gotten over the shell shock of people going in and out of my apartment. i have made friends with some really really cool ass people. and i mean we are friends, we know each other. we talk fairly frequently. i feel grounded by these people.

i dont know what to make of it, or if i should be concerned.

the good thing, is that they readily concede i am insane and possibly dangerous. so they dont fuck with me too much. except here there word snips. snipsnip.

i have a pretty diverse group of people i talk to online and in person. yet to meet someone cool offline, but am talking on the phone with a couple of cool ass fuckers up north i sorely want to meet. one is a transexual (guy to girl), the other is just a horny ass dude that doesnt cease to entertain me with what he can teach me about such intimate acts. but i mean i got cool people i hang out with, i go dancing with, i go to parties with. i have intellectuals. i have d&d geeks, marshal artists, druggies, artists, musicians, great people to talk cars with, technical stuff, computers, politics, life, philosophy, just to share dirty jokes with and hilarious stories. i have met several people who have extensive knowledge on music and cool movies i havent heard of or seen. even the sweet natured homemakers are beautiful people and the quiet ones have like this glow about them. i work with a great group of people at both of my jobs. how often does that happen? i play pool with some of the most chill people i have ever met. people at this bar i go to arent annoying drunks! that is unheard of! there are people that make bombs in their basement, and shit crazy shit. i just shut up and listen when these people talk.

i have in turn met a few lame ass people, but the ratio of good to bad far out weighs the need to withdraw.

i still havent met a serial killer, met a convict, two actually. i know stuff about my neighborhood that would shock my grandmother to know. still want to meet more artists and writer types to form a little show and tell circle.

yes, i find this strange. i find it stranger to be in people’s homes, and people i don’t know gathering in my living room. but for someone who is lazy, eh… it works.

i think the biggest problem i have is finding common ground with other people. which is kinda the crutch of the matter, becuz what use do i have for people who have my same interests and disposition and history? how do i broaden my horizons, learn knew things, expand and help expand… really… when it’s common knowledge? well i know logically that it is good to find hobbies, and talents to share in common becuz then you feed each other, teach and support each other but that isnt really meeting interesting people. the most intoxicating experience is those we have no previous predilection toward or so i have experimented with.

am i wrong?

so this year i started going out. i still don’t have the balls to go out by myself. it was my experiment to just drop this leave me alone, bad ass attitude and try to connect with people to get a perspective. so the normal rules of which i adhere to i kinda chucked aside, such as the dont touch me, dont cling to me, dont whine at me standards. people dont want to listen to an individual who has no experience as knowing what they are talking about. so my goal this year was to dirty myself so i could have some stories to drag out for the “small talk”. however i did meet some interesting people this year, for what they were, which were sad little monkeys.

oiy. lets see… i went out with an ordained priest for a while, he was kind… too tolerating, too caring and indulgent. he really tried my patience. i had to get away from him… and then to take a completely different approach i went out with a drug addict. he was the sadest man i have ever met, and i have met some pretty crummy people. he kissed me and i felt my skin crawl. we did X together, and i had to just get out of that situation. a pity, he needed someone to give him a make over, i wanted to… but when you start talking about moving in together, living out in the country, traveling together… yeah thats just kinda creepy to me. there were other people too. i hung out with some hustler types, and a guy that tought me about Islam. i miss him. i also met a guy who shared my addiction to writing and we got along well, i lost my phone, and never gave back that movie… but i still have his email. maybe i should try to get back in touch. i hung out with some college kids this year too. shakes head, i don’t know what it is with me, tequila and showers… but that was the biggest joke of the summer. boyz are dumb.

the girls aren’t much better. and i really didn’t meet any new ones to add to my list, however got to know some a bit better that i have known for years, but never really knew…who never really knew me. i need some good girl friends, and i admit i have them. its just there is no reaching them right now. i hung out with a stripper after a concert. actually two, but the other one was interested in making the money. i’ve met moms, and career women. women just as lonely and barren in their destitute it killed me to come in contact with them. me and my grandmother got to know each other a bit better this year, she actually talked to me about her younger days. i now know where i get my “better than thou” attitude.

then i actually met… words fail me. he opened my eyes a bit. i saw a different side of humanity i had not seen in quite some time. he’s one of the happy people in life, i think truly blessed in grace and ease of mind. i still dont know what it was about him, but i never seemed to be able to shut up around him. i think i liked to make him laugh.

shakes head, well this year is almost over… and i feel like i have still fell short of my goals. i am reinstating my bar of expectations of people, and will not lower my standards again to be so indulging of stupid people. the upcoming year i hope to meet one other person out there abroad. i’m just tired right now i think, and swamped with all my plans of agenda for the upcoming year. i don’t really feel like being all that sociable right now… but there are some nice people out there if you look for’em.

i think what it is… isn’t so much that there aren’t any nice people out there reproducing, they just don’t go to excess, and they’re hidden by the masses of stupid people. with an increase in population there is naturally more opportunities of meeting with the ugly side of humanity, but so too true the chances of meeting someone truly wonderful is increased in turn. so if it doesn’t work out, its not that your odds of happiness are deminished by half.. you just have to go through ten other assholes to find that one person… if that is what you are looking for. so think of it this way every time you hear no, or rather conclude for yourself “no way in hell!”, just think you are that much closer to that one who will say yes.