learn to love myself

I’m starting to really like myself. I never thought this could happen. On my wonderful journey, I’m discovering new things about me, taking better care of myself, enjoying being alone getting things accomplished, feeling more confident.

I’m starting to see me as how many others have seen me for years, I just did not believe it myself. I’m on the right path to loving myself. I’m hand and hand with our Lord along the way.

I’m learning…Today, I enjoyed a “Me” day. You know the story…You have the hot body, makeup always in place (without dark circles), wardrobe to envy, the interior of your car is free of HappyMeal bags and drink cups. You walk with a confidence that others admire, your fingernails and toenails are painted in a pretty color that matches. While standing in line, your asked “Who does your hair? I love it!”. Your excited about your evening date with that slim-trim-built-romantic man of your dreams, and then BAAM. BAAM, BAAM – 20 years down the road you or it are nothing like the above description!

Today, I covered my “dark circles” with new make-up and I put on a new spring sweater that looked really nice on me. I had my finger nails and toe nails painted and they’re pretty in pink. I had my hair highlighted and a new “bobish” style cut and afterwards, I cleaned and vacuumed the interior of “MY” car and changed the radio station to my kind of music…It felt wonderful, I feel wonderful and it’s a wonderful feeling be loving yourself again.

Learning to “Love Myself”. May include, we should learn to accept the past and let it go… Learn from it but not repeat it.

A quote from the sidebar on 43T’s…

I like dreams of the future better than history of the past.
- Thomas Jefferson

Affirmations list from MisMolly that I am “adopting” (with her permission).

I forgive myself and others for what we have done.
I am beautiful.
I am a fast learner.
I am a friendly person.
I am easily aware of peoples needs and feelings.
Loving myself heals my life. I nourish my mind, body and soul.
I attract only healthy relationships.
I choose to make positive healthy choices for myself.
I choose to exercise regularly.
When I believe in myself, so do others.
I express my needs and feelings.
I am my own unique self – special, creative and wonderful.
All my relationships are loving and harmonious.
I am at peace.
I trust in the process of life.
Life is a joy filled with delightful surprises.
I prosper wherever I turn and I know that I deserve prosperity of all kinds.
I know that I deserve Love and accept it now.
I give out Love and it is returned to me multiplied.
I rejoice in the Love I encounter everyday.
I am strong.

I will add one to each scripture reading notes, I have taped on the cabinets and mirrors.

Bring on the reinforcements!!!!

On the road to loving myself. I’m excited about how I am starting to express my thoughts and feelings without being embarrassed or feeling any guilt.

I realized today, while taking with my husband (separated), how I would let him make me feel about his rationalizing his poor choices, on me (my) depression, low self-esteem…and the effect I would ALLOW it to have on me (devastating). I disagreed with him during a conversation today about the “choice” he made that brought us to our separation. I didn’t go there…to the land of self-destruction!

Today, while on my journey to Love Myself, I’m not falling into that way of thinking. I know, I’m not the “cause” for his poor choices, it was his decision, said and done.

Another step towards loving Lis.

I have joined two groups that include “love myself”. They both are listed on my list of 43. I first joined “Love Myself” and then I started to think after I viewed “Learn to Love Myself” which one should I commit to. Some may view them the same, but my thinking is that they may be really two different stages of loving oneself?

I’m going to keep both groups on my 43things list. Both groups each had great ideas and entry’s. I once believed that I “Loved Myself” about 20 some years ago. But the choices that I made over the years contradicts that belief. If I truly did, loved and respected me, why did I chose to follow the path of self-destruction, that has taken me to not loving me, feeling worthy of me and appreciating the gift of life that Our Lord has blessed me with.

Without self love, you have nothing. I believe this is true for me. I had been blessed with a wonderful, loving, spiritual and successful husband 20 years ago. My life has been blessed with three beautiful children, nice home and financially secure.

But without loving me, I feel nothing…or enjoy the awesome gifts that I have had given. My husband and I are now separated (with God’s Grace we are working and taking our time to get back together as one). My children (teenagers) are yearning for the feeling of being loved by me. My home is nicely decorated but does not have the “warm and homey” feeling to it. The financial security that I also have been blessed with – has dwindled down a little over the years of spending to make me “feel” loved.

This past three months I have been on this wonderful journey. I call it “Lis’journey08”. My journey is to include: Grow in my relationship with Christ, make Him first in my life. Have love for myself, appreciate life, family, learn who I am, what I like, things I like to do, meet people, enjoy their company and friendship. Be happy and thankful for who I am.

With these steps in my journey and fulfilling them, I can’t think of anything but starting or having love for myself.

Today, I am able to share with you that I am worthy of the time I’m going to spend on myself. My eyes are opened to the wonderful gifts that I have and look forward to experiencing the love for me that I know I have deep within.

_Lis