learn to relax

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Peace…..

This weekend I bought a MP3 player so I could play the hypnosis and new-age music in bed to fall asleep, but the results were not so well. I fell asleep with the relaxing sounds of Tibetische Klangschalen, only to wake up a few hours later. So I started it again and very soon I was off to sleep… to awake one hour later. Played it again and was asleep in minutes… to awake one hour later. This process repeated itself through the whole night. This was clearly not what I had in mind when I wanted to relax. I wanted to sleep the whole night through.

Yesterday before going to bed I played some mp3 that should help you getting into a deep sleep, which worked remarkably well. A bit too well, even within a few minutes when the person started counting from 10 to 1 I can’t even remember having heard 3… and in the morning I woke up too late, I slept through my alarm without any problems. Now I wonder wether it was because I was very tired or thanks to the mp3. Anyway, I shouldn’t care, it’s the effect that counts.

Yesterday instead of listening relaxation music I had visit from a friend and drank a few beers. It helped me relax, but it was not in the way I intended to… Guess I’ll have to retry this evening.

I need to learn how to relax, I’m too neurotic. I constantly unconsciously scratch myself at some part of my body, one time my elbows, other times my neck, wrists. I thought the cause is my eczeem, but I recently think there is more to just that, because I also scratch at places where it doesn’t itch, up to the point that the skin gets open and bleeds.

I’m collecting now some self-hypnosis files and relaxation music, which I intend to listen to in the evening in hope this will help easing the tension a bit.

Not only I hope it will make me feel better, but also look better. Also another goal I wish to accomplish which I will list seperately but is related to learning to relax is my compulsive behaviour of biting nails.