My boyfriends always wants to go out cuz hes very social but i always get nervous. maybe it has to do with my self confidence and with the way i view my appearance. it also has to do with my nervousness with talking to people. i should put that on my 43things to do…...i gotta get a book on how to speak more affectivly. it feels like i have lost speach patterns or something heh.
anyways, we always fight kinda when his friends call and i get all meloncholy about wanting to go out. we dont fight exactly but he can tell that i look a lil sad and that i dont wanna go out. it does get boring staying in all the time but i reaaaaaally should work on knowing that once im somewhere, things will be ok. the pre-nerves get to me and sometimes id rather not know what situation is gonna be like. maybe i have social anxiety. in any event, i gotta work on this so that it would make my life easier and my bfs =/