eliminate the stuff from my life which doesn't fulfill me spiritually, emotionally or creatively

The library’s tag sale is coming up in a few weeks.

I want to donate as much as possible for it.
It’s a great added incentive to eliminate some unnecessary clutter!

Today I donated 4 books. I am going to try to part with at least another 6 books and fill one large box of other items in the next two weeks.

but I barely scratched the surface.

I am still fighting the insecurity, the lack of trust of abundance in my life and the ability to get the resources I need when I need it. It’s so hard of me to get rid of things I haven’t used in years- “just in case”.

This is all emotional. I realize that now. So how do I address this? More affirmations? Therapy?

I have a lot of thinking (and a lot of purging) to do.

I am going to go dive into the clutter and tame it
RIGHT NOW.

I gave away a large item that had traveled cross-country with me, but I had never used.

I have so much more like this to eliminate!

It’s a matter of getting rid of the “just in case” mentality and trusting my capacity to obtain the resources I need at the time I need them, assuming I will ever need them at all.

What am I trying to escape?
How can I face that which I’m trying to escape head-on, and thus reduce the need for escape?

I have to remember that the feeling of working towards my goals and getting things done is exhilarating.
The feeling of looking at pictures of captioned cats is not.

(You would think this would be a no-brainer, but apparently, I still need to remind myself.)

I’ve been keeping many things that I used in the classroom for when/if I go back to the classroom. They are useful, important things I’d need if I went back to the classroom.

I haven’t been a classroom teacher for 5 years now. Now that the center got the federal grant, I am not likely to be one in the near future either.

I’ve been working on organizing my home office for a few days now, trying to gear up for my new responsibilities with my imminent return to full time work. So I decided to let go of the classroom materials. Yes, in three years, when the grant is finished, I might need to try to get back in a school. But I know that the “just in case” mentality that keeps me in clutter likely holds me back in other ways as well. It’s time to trust in me to keep moving forward and to find the resources I need at the times I need them.

Boxing up the teaching materials was a very emotional process. Not that I want to be a classroom teacher any more, just that it’s hard to say goodbye to a version of yourself- even if that version is 5 years in the past.

While switching my closet from summer wear to fall/winter wear this week, I’ve been consciously paring down my accumulation of clothing. I noticed that some of my shoes were not being worn a lot, because they weren’t comfortable or have worn down over the years.

I’ve previously kept them nonetheless because I didn’t want to spend the money buying new shoes, but that’s silly. I need to respect myself and fulfill my need for comfort and my need to look professional with new shoes- hang the cost!

Bonus- two or three pairs of well-bought new shoes will replace the many pairs I purged from my closet, giving me more space.

I’ve eliminated the facebook time-suck from my life, and it is not missed at all. In my further attempts to make my 24 hours a day work for me, not against me, I realized there is another activity I could cut out of my life: blog reading.

I spend lots of time reading political blogs. What I learn from them is miniscule compared to the time I waste on the computer. So I’m going to experiment: if I delete them from my computer bookmarks, will I actually miss them?

I suspect not. I also suspect more time will open up for activities and goals that will truly fulfill me.

It wastes a lot of time, makes me feel somewhat competitive, and encourages inauthenticity on my part. Inauthentic in that it encourages considering one’s life as something to be well-presented for others’ viewing, rather than something to be messily but truly lived.

I’m not ready to delete my account yet, but I am ready to stop reading it as much as I used to.

Hmmm. This feels good. What other non-fulfilling things can I eliminate?