Raise strong, happy children

They invited the kids over for the first time (since we just moved back to this neighborhood) and the neighbors said, “you don’t have a lot of toys or board games.” I was getting ready to feel sorry for my kids. We moved and had to leave a lot of stuff behind, although I tried to keep their favorite toys, and we’re going through a transitional financial period with no cash to spare on restocking toys (even if I wasn’t feeling anti-consumerist and not wanting to buy the cheap plastic crap that they shove down our throats ever 12 minutes on tv) but instead of feeling sad for themselves, my kids said, “You don’t need board games. You can make your own board games. You can make anything!”

And later that day, my daughter sat down with a piece of paper and a marker and started making her own game with it’s own rules. And I helped her create number tiles with seashells and a sharpie.

Now I’m thinking I will make them a “do it yourself” game board for Christmas, with blanks they can fill in, and empty draw cards and playing pieces, etc. I might even make our own dice out of sculpey. Or maybe the seashells work fine.

We haven’t had much money since having kids, but I am glad that I have instilled in them a creativity that says they don’t need money to have fun or to get what they want. And that they feel they can figure out how to do stuff or make stuff and are not limited by what is already out there.

Now I’m thinking about all sorts of play kits… like a detective kit. My kids also decided, yesterday, to be detectives and track where the lizards were going, so they got some flour and a toy makeup brush and started dusting for lizard tracks. I mean… the possibilities of games are endless. Detective kit. Fort kit. Tea party set. Fairy houses. Bean bag games. Target sets. Puppet show sets. Dress up outfits for plays.

Now I’m trying to figure out ways I can help them in their imaginative play.

For all the struggles of raising kids, and the struggles of a tiny budget, I am proud that my children are resilient, creative, positive, imaginative, confident, flexible and independent.

No matter how many times they ask for the pink plastic cotton candy maker.

Today is the kids’ first day of school in a new state. We woke them up early and fed them and dressed them in comfy, cool clothes. We drove to school and waited in the office for half an hour. We walked through the open campus of the 100 year old, Spanish style school building (pretty!) with students wandering about with their hall passes and crossing guard badges, and walked to the kids school rooms.

All the students were smiling and looked happy. There were flowers and plants everywhere. An outdoor gym and lunch tables, courtyards, the beginning of a butterfly garden. Gabriel turned to me and said, “I’m a little scared,” and I said that was okay.

Then we got to their classrooms and Ivy’s teacher was tall and pretty and friendly and the secretary told us she was one of the favorite teachers in the whole school. Ivy will like her because she’s fancy, though. Fancy Ivy. And all the little kids were looking at Ivy curiously.

And Gabriel’s teacher was a man and he was young and friendly and asked if Gabriel went by ‘Gabriel’ or ‘Gabe’ which is very respectful since G hates ‘Gabe,’ and that class was very small and all the kids looked friendly.

And then we left them to their new school and trusted that they would be okay because they are strong, happy kids, even though they were a little scared and a little nervous.

I just read back some of these entries. They were so little. Bottles. Naps. Diapers. I am gone from that era of childrearing (huzzah!) and on to school time, learning to read, tying shoes, teaching responsibilities, making sure they do their chores and eat real food before candy and get their homework done and negotiate the landscape of interpersonal relationships with the wider world.

Gabriel is 7 and going into second grade.

Ivy is 5 and is starting full time Kindergarten in a matter of weeks.

My kids are big.

And they are the best thing in my life. The thing that is the most successful.

I don’t think I’ll finish this goal until they are out on their own and are legal adults, but…they are now strong, happy children.

Look at that. A first grader. Of course, his teacher is worried he won’t be ready for first grade, so I’ve taken it upon myself to review all the math and writing and reading from the year, as well as add some science and art projects. This is my summer camp home school. Because I don’t have enough to do.

So I have some lessons in the works. I’ve got a ring of index cards for words to read and write. I’ve got a ring of index cards for a girl, too, although she’s going to be working on the alphabet first.

She just asked me where the pee comes from. Perhaps we’ll do a unit on the body. That would be cool.

My first unit, however, is on outer space. G wants an outer space 6th birthday party. So my plan is to tie a whole month of learning to projects that can be used for the party. We’ll make paper mache models of the solar system. We’ll learn about what the earth is made of and how the seasons, lunar cycle and days happen. He’ll write out his findings and create diagrams. Perhaps he’ll make a comic books about an astronaut who flies through the solar system and discovers things. We’ll make toilet paper tube rockets and soda bottle jet packs and home made milky way play dough. Who knows? And then for the party we’ll have Asteroid nuggets and Saturn apple rings, and galaxy fruit kabobs, and cheeze ball moons and an icecream/brownie cake with stars. We’ll invite 6 of his friends and one of my friends with her girls for playmates for the girlie, and there will be the party. VOILA.

So that’s growing up.
Also growing up… thought I’d tell you. Everyone is potty trained now. Even night trained mostly.

And today was the first day that the girl allowed her ponytails to stay in all day, instead of pulling them out after 2 minutes.

Yay for growing up and all its challenges.

Sometimes it’s surprising, because he did have troubles learning to speak and even now has a hard time getting his words out… but… it’s amazing. His mind is always working. He thinks about things. He remembers things. He makes connections. He understands. I know that’s all just human stuff, but it’s wild to see how it happens, how kids are just SMART, and then they learn about the world and get smarter.

I think so.

But I shan’t mark this done, seeing as no one is even doing potty by themselves yet.

Let’s wait for a bit more independence.

G

Do not take your pacifiers, your favorite teddy bear, your blue blankie, your two other blankies and your new purple ball and pile them up in front of your bedroom door to go to sleep.

I know you like to lay there and peek under the door, and the wood is so smooth and warm, but whenever I come to check on you, that door bonks you on your head. And sometimes, I can not open the door up at all and can not check to see if you and your baby sister are in fact, okay.

Please stay in your lovely little toddler bed when I put you to bed at night. Thank you.

Love and kisses,
Your Mommy

Boy woke up this morning, and on the way from his bedroom to ours, decided the bottle of Murphy’s Oil Soap would be a good treat. He took a swig or two, I think, probably threw up a little, came to tell us his tummy hurt. Threw up some more. Told papa what he drank, got to ride in an ambulance (at 6 am) to the emergency room, threw up some more, found out the Yucky stuff would only cause GI problems like throwing up and diarrhea, threw up some more, got an IV for hydration, took a nap, woke up, asked for food, got some icecream, was told he could go home, took a subway ride, met with Papa and Ivy at his favorite restaurant, had orange juice, nibbled at food, danced like a maniac in the restaurant, took a taxi home, had a major poo, got a new toy set of dinosaurs that we had been holding for him, played crazy dino games, ate chicken nuggets with ketchup, had some milk, played games with baby sister, read some books and cuddled with Ivy and Mama in bed, then conked out.

This was G’s day, in one run-on sentence.

Did it make him strong? I guess it didn’t kill him, and there were some definite moments of happy. Okay then. I want to go to bed.

Spent some time at bedtime in bed with G cuddling and talking about his day. I was asking about his favorite cartoons and asked if Scooby do was his best friend, his favorite. He said “Mine!” which I thought referred to Scooby, but then he said, “Ivy!” and I realized he meant Ivy was his best friend, his favorite. And then he said “Mama” and then he said “Papa!” And I hugged him and said that he was my favorite too, and so was Ivy and Papa.

Then Ivy started screaming. Usually, I cuddle G then I take Ivy out of the crib and cuddle her in the glider, but she was having none of it. So I took her out and the three of us cuddled on G’s bed. That’s what I want. All of us cuddling in the same bed. And soon, I will be able to read to them both at the same time. Ivy is difficult to read to because she usually gets up and wanders around, so I’d have to get her to go down again… but I think it’s starting to work, she’s getting older and now and won’t just squirm and try to get up while I’m trying to calm G down. I’m really looking forward to the time when we can all read together. I remember when my sister and I used to sit in bed with my mom and read not just picture books, but chapter books and classic fairy tales. That went a long way to foster my love of reading.