Decorate my home

why isn’t it easy to have at least one room decent, company-ready all the time so i can enjoy decorating it? becouse i’m not ready to pay the price, and that is, to pick after my SO. i’m not his mom and don’t plan to becom one. this is so depressing. it should already have been sparkling clean and tidy! i totaly love to decorate, it is very essential need to me. but i can’t decorate dirty and untidy room. and i don’t plan to pick aftery somebody. i clean daily as much as i can. this story is fundamentally wrong.

pls help me see what’s wrong in this story!

...hung clean curtains on dirty windows…yuck! well, noone is perfect. it is that i’ve changed color sheme and orange curtains really clashed with it. so i washed white curtains and hang it, who cares! i can’t wash windows in the dark, anyhow… maybe next Sat.

i have some color glassware that clashes with my china, both of them. yesterday i had the idea to group glassware of similar color together for some occasions. and now i have idea to connect disparate glassware with matcing table-cloth, candles and other decoration.

i learned decluttering is so much easier having final goal in mind, and that is decorating.
i switched my focus to my SO’s place since it is in bigger nead than mine, we started extensive reorganisation, changing functions of almost each room.
2 rooms are reorganised and almost done (his mom’s room and veranda), it’s been a month, and we spent lots of time planning new arangement (maybe several weeks) in living room before actually doing it.

now the living room is in focus: walls are painted white and i plan to decorate in black and white, combined with earthy tones. since furniture is black and white (actual creamy beige). i’m contemplating wall papers, but only partially; i have plenty ideas and practice patience.
hanging furniture is in it’s place, and hopefully soon bottom part will arrive, too. my SO wanted to finish work in adjacent small kitchen-to-be becouse of dust and everything, to finish dirty jobs before we bring in the furniture and equipment.

(it is becouse before, long time ago, we turned living room to bedroom and opened wall and installed door to kitchen that was part of another room, we closed it and made it into closet, that actually never worked since there is no heating there, so it gradually degraded into junkroom. now we are making that room into living room again, e.g. into media center, and turning the closet into kitchen again, so my SO need to drill the walls and instal sockets. Plumbing is already there from previous kitchen, hidden in the walls.)

this is all big and happy event and i spent lots of time thinking of interior design. this brings me great satisfaction. and new and even better ideas keep coming. yay!

this goal didn’t make into my top 5 goals. it’s a shame considering how much joy this goal can bring to me. but i don’t see how to increase declutter/clutter ratio in my home so there is no point in decorating it.

yes my kitchen table is still nice (after i put away things somebody put on it again and again and again), but it is tiny island in ocean. it is sad reminder on how things could be nice.

i ordered this book from amazon, i’m sure it will bring me insight – just reading the TOC is comforting.

i decorated my kitchen e.g. kithen table: advent napkin and fabulous advent centerpiece i made myself. that pushed me to bring the rest of kitchen to total order. that’s why i woke before dawn several days in a row – it was worth it!

at sat i went to woods collected pine twigs and other things; i found awesome stuff. i made 2 advent wreaths from it (and stuff that were already in the house): one is on our cofeetable in living room and other hangs from pendant – totaly cool. i enjoyed the nature plus i didn’t spent a dime.

although large areas of my home are in phase of decluttering, i started to decorate my home an am really excited about it.
i discovered i can decorate a room as soon as it is clean and clutter is not visible – this is new twist.
i just can’t wait until majority of stuff is declutered.
i am inspired by the great book about interior decorating i got recently from my SO (i told him to buy it for me for xmass but we didn’t waited – i can allways put it under the tree)

so i decorated my 2 bathrooms and my bedroom.
i cleaned bathrooms thoroughly and changed area rugs and smal things in order to match new color scheme. miracle: all things were already in the house, i only purchased 1 rug.

bedroom was already straight and vacuumed so i only put throw over the bed and made small decoration for windowsill (it turned out that it is too small but i’m delighted i made it! i already owned: two candles, one nice plate, i wrapped candles in bay-leaves and added some nice wrapping paper. it turned cute.)

will post’em soon!
i don’t have ‘before’ photo so it won’t be visible what a major change it is.
we also hung 2 old chandeliers (didn’t powered them to, need to get them repaired and shop opens in a week) and they fit in nicely

i had no intention of decorating, i just rearranged my furniture in living room as part of decluttering project, and everything clicked!
now, all of the sudden, i have matching plaids and pillows and it even turned out to be the right feng shui colors for that part of room.
my glass cupboards are full of beautifull colored glass items. (i adore colored glass!!) they blended and mached together in miraculous way!

my living room is beautifull already and i purchased not a single item! all things already existed and just come to right places. it is wonderfull!!

and also i forgot to mention flowers i potted on balcony – it is decoration, too!

i’m gratefull to lots of helping hands: my SO moved all the furniture several times, my SO’s relatives and our neighbours and unkonown people helped get my piano (and couch and lots of other things) from other town.

i seriously given up this goal
and it causes immense sadness
it means having no home at all, just a place to stay

i burned out, begging for help, not having any
i spent 2 years of my life wanting to decorate our home but with no support
2 years of longing and bitternes for waiting too much
crashed too many times and raised again only to crash again so i wished from bottom of my hart to stop wanting this goal cus not being able to have it caused so much pain
finally i don’t want it any more, i don’t care for it
finally he understands and wants to help but now it’s too late i even quit cooking and cleaning

this was the most important goal for me, if i can’t have it i don’t care for anything. it is less painfull this way.

i appologize for such a gloomy entry but this is how the things currently are.

Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they let you in.
- Robert Frost

• my workplace
• swimming pool where I go
• my rowing club
• different groups of people i belong and places where i meet them
• 43T, of course! :)

According to this perspective, I have more than one home; so I may stop swetting and freeking over making my place a home and let it be. Maybe the home is state of mind.