schwerz in New York State is doing 40 things including…

wear a bikini

4 cheers


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schwerz has written 9 entries about this goal

I did it!

I bought one, and actually wore it to the beach this weekend while on Spring Break.

The first day was awkward, yes, but by the second day, it seemed like I was ten times more comfortable.

I’m glad I did it. I’m still a little selfconcious about my stomach, but I’ve got time to work on that. Summer is just a few months away :)

If anyone wants some encouragement or tips let me know :)

Second thoughts

“Maybe I’m not ready for this. Why do I look so bloated? Maybe I should take this back…”

A lot of my friends don’t give a second-thought to wearing a bikini. But I still feel self-concious. I bought one at the end of last summer, but it was too skimpy. Now I have one I like… I’m just not so sure I like it on me.
I compare myself to other girls. I’m most self-concious about my stomach. So as I stare at mine in the mirror, never feeling satisfied, I think of what other girls’ stomachs look like. It’s a bad habit, I know. I need to stop.

Sometimes I like my body. But once I put it in a bikini, I feel so exposed.

Somewhere deep inside I know I can pull it off a lot easier than a lot of other girls. And I know I’ll look good lying down or in the water. But then I think of skinnier girls or what I look like when I’m standing up in it or sitting down…I just get discouraged.

But I’m going to try it. I am going on spring break next week…where I won’t know anybody. I guess I can test it out there. The only people around will be my mom, sister, my friend, and a bunch of strangers. So, I’ll let you know how it goes.

This will be a lot easier...

...once I have to wear a little genie costume in front of an entire audience in a couple weeks. I’ll have a bodysuit underneath but still…I feel uncomfortable showing everything. But the next time I’ll have a chance to wear a bikini, at least it will be around my choir friends…who would have already seen me in a genie-like outfit. Haha :)


I didn’t do it over the summer. :( however, I’m going to Florida in December with tons of friends…I’ll have to do it then!

I just want to start firming things up around my stomach and tush.

I’m kind of nervous though. :(


And I’ve stopped wearing shorts over my tankini. That helps a lot. I don’t feel so much like I’m hiding anymore.


I can’t find one with a pattern I love! Except…the ones I saw at old navy a long time ago are on sale for like $6 a piece now. Soooo I might have to go check that out. :)


Today a bunch of my friends and I had a little get-together at my friend’s pool. I felt so lame in my tankini. Why, you ask? Well, I’m sure people could just tell my looking at me that I was self-concious (I had mesh shorts on over my bottoms as well.) And then people always say that having no confidence is not attractive. This is why I felt “lame.” I really want a bikini as fast as possible now. I would still wear the shorts, but I’d feel better about myself if I wore a bikini.

The other day I asked myself, “Why do I want one? Just because everyone else wears them?” But that’s not the answer. I know if I had one, I’d be proving to myself that I am confident. So it’s definately not peer pressure. :)

I Almost Bought One.

Yesterday I tried on a bunch at Old Navy. Bathing suits were on sale. When I tried them on, I felt comfortable in them…but I just didn’t find one with a pattern I LOVED. Even though they were cheap, I didn’t think it was worth it. Hopefully next time I’ll have better luck.

Why tankinis?

A bunch of people asked me why I don’t wear bikinis if I’m “so skinny.” Well, I don’t think I’m THAT skinny, but I could pull one off if I wanted too. But not even I can understand why I don’t wear one. I guess because whenever I try one on, I feel so naked. Maybe I’m modest. But it’s not even a big deal…it’s just my stomach. I don’t know. But I’m going to have to buy one first to accomplish this goal. ;D

schwerz has gotten 4 cheers on this goal.


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