Stop drinking so much

OK….so I really stuffed up on the weekend. On both Friday night and Saturday night I was up til 4.30-5am drinking on my own. Feel bad, really really bad as this was the very thing I have been trying to cut out.
I guess I am going to have to go back to the “STOP DRINKING” Post rather than “STOP DRINKING SO MUCH”.

I was doing so well before this :-(

I just commemnted on someone else’s post and wanted to share it here with others as well…

Hey there, you are so right about enjoying a few drinks for what they are. And this week I have only had 3 drinks, which is insane for me also – capable of drinking 30 standard drinks in one sitting no problems. In fact I have had many a great afternoon, drinking wine with friends who also drink too much, and consider those afternoons as great times in my life.
The difference between me and my friends however, is that at worst, I will go home and keep drinking until I pass out at 5am, at best, go home and have another bottle of wine by myself. Some days I have woken up at 3pm, not knowing what the hell happened.
NO MORE. Feeling tired at the normal time and going to bed feels so good. No more sleeping through the alarm and waking at 2pm when I was supposed to be at work by 8.30am, and seeing 10+ missed calls on my mobile from my boss. No more sneaking drinks from other people again. No more choosing alcohol over my boyfriend, who I treasure so so much and can’t believe I have done this so many times. No more hurting myself, no more walking home in the dark, all stumbling around and shit, after the pub.
The list goes on.
Someday I will be able to JUST have 3 drinks with friends and leave it there, not feel the need to go home and booze on by myself. I am trying to grow a stop button….and if I don’t have one then I will have to give it away completley. I really don’t want to do that though.

hi there everyone, I made it through last night without opening the bottle of wine and I just may make it through tonight as well. Hurrah! its like I don’t want to have the “one” drink unless there is a good reason. And right now there’s not.
I’m 800 words into the assignment I was stressing about, 1200 words to go. Its not the writing, its the fact it all has to be referenced to “respected titles in industry”, so whatever I say in the piece, I have to go and find someone published that said it also. So I’ll see how I go. Maybe once I have handed in this assignment I can reward myself with a glass of wine. Back to that again….
I hope everyone else is doing OK tonight. I watched Jill’s intervention on YouTube last night and it was really homehitting, I watched heaps of them actually. here is the link for anyone interested http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TNkqpPuMAnI.
Nothing else doing really, except avoiding the assignment.
Cheers (with can of coke in hand).
Jenny

OK. So its Friday night. How is everyone doing. My partner sat me down once again and said to me it is OK to drink one or two if I want to, so right now there is a full bottle of wine in the fridge. I am thinking of having one while we watch a movie.
But then I could choose not to. I would only be having it for the sake of it. I can trust myself not to drink the whole thing. Also I have an assignment due at uni on Tuesday next week so I simply can’t afford to get blitzed and write off tomorrow.
Feeling pretty good, had a headache earlier on though….could this be a sign of withdrawal? I drank heaps of water today so its not dehydration!
Lets all raise our glasses of water!! Hurrah! Also, it helps to watch “Intervention” videos on YouTube (is a little mean to make self feel better because of others that are worse….is this not passing judgement).
Happy, healthy and clean goodnight to all. I will report back on whether or not I had the glass of wine tomorrow but at this stage I am not too bothered about it.
Love to all. x

OK….so I caved…..I had 3-4 glasses of wine at the function. I was still OK to drive so I don’t feel that bad about it.
My partner sat me down and said he didn’t think that I needed to give it away completely, that was not what he was asking for (Not that this is the sole reason I am giving up), but he wanted me to stop drinking on my own til 3-4am in the morning on the weekends & being all depressive and shit.
So off I went. I still won’t be drinking during the week or at home anymore.
Am I letting it get the better of me….a lot of people on here say that you should give it up completely if you have alch issues. I plan on having a sober weekend studying and make this the first week in history that I only had the 3-4 drinks on one sitting on one night. And according to health standards, 3-4 drinks is still within the acceptable limit per day, isn’t it?
DENIAL!!!
Am in bed now so I think I have been pretty good. Just wish I could have made it to the weekend. Kick up arse needed!!!

Yesterday I had to leave uni early because I felt so exhausted still and was slow all day. Had to take emergency contraceptive on Monday night as slacked off on taking the pill (due to forgetting things) and wondering if that is reason for tiredness. Had fight with boyfriend. He was acting distant, so I launched into a whingy attack on him about how he’s not interested anymore, which led to him yelling at me, and tears (mine). All is forgiven, we finally get to sleep about 12 and reluctantly, I decide that my heightened emotional state on the back of weekend does not help things.

I have not thought about drinking at all which is great, and today, Wednesday, I am starting to feel good. I’m not as tired and I can feel myself thinking faster….and not getting as upset about things internally. Lady at work suggested I do meditation with them on Tuesdays & Mondays as this can help with “calming the tiger within”, or in layman’s terms, not making such a big deal of things. Fingers crossed I will not cave tomorrow night at Gianni’s Portside, where I will be offered the finest food and wine this town has to offer……or I’ve ever had in my life so far, bugger. But if they have fine wine, they will have fine juice. Will be fun to watch the bigwig academics and professionals in my industry get pissed and talk shit! Will be the one watching for once!

Woke up this morning feeling gross and still hungover from Saturday night’s binge. My eyes were bloodshot and I felt like I could have slept for a millon years. Felt depressed all day and down in the dumps, and ended up getting angry text message from my boyfriend who I think is also irritable from lack of sleep (I kept him awake on Saturday night when he had to work early on Sunday, and he was up late last night as well) and annoyed at me being all moochy and wanting reassurance while he is at work.

Absolutely no housework got done on the weekend either and my assignment is yet to be started. Panic as have uni tomorrow night and PRIA thingo on Thursday night.

So Monday comes with a lot of guilt but I am feeling good today. Did not want to drink today but that is usual after a weekend binge.

Last night I drank 2 bottles of wine and sat on the balcony listening to music, in the dark, smoking. Needless to say this has been a big issue for my boyfriend and I am afraid to say that I will lose him if I continue binge drinking.

So after yet another argument about my drinking, I quietly sat down and wrote him a pledge promising to not drink for 30 days and never binge drink again thereafter, and should I break this promise, agreed to leave immediately and let him find someone that loves themselves as well as him.

So, I am not going to drink for 30 days. Already I am thinking of how to manage social events and an upcoming industry awards dinner without booze! How boring to just have juice and coke. Wish me luck!