stop fighting

We still have the occassional argument, but we get along SO much better than we used to, and are able to communicate our feelings without screaming at eachother.

So I was able to have a serious talk with my guy last night about something that was bothering me without screaming and fighting. This was much harder to do than it sounds. Usually when something is bothering me I tell him in a very honest albeit unsensitive manner and it usually explodes into an all out brawl. I was glad to see that I could actually communicate with him without resorting to that, however it left me feeling like I still had a lot to say. This tells me that I need to practice this type of communication more often to get over this feeling.

I remember watching The Notebook for the first time (sidebar: OMG, how hot is Ryan Gosling?!) and there was a particular scene in the movie that hit very close to home:

Young Allie: Stay with you? What for? Look at us, we’re already fightin’

Young Noah: Well that’s what we do, we fight… You tell me when I am being an arrogant son of a bitch and I tell you when you are a pain in the ass. Which you are, 99% of the time. I’m not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have like a 2 second rebound rate, then you’re back doing the next pain-in-the-ass thing.

When I saw this I said to myself “Holy crap, that is SO my relationship!”. We fight. We fight constantly. We love each other, but we just can’t seem to get along. My guy sees this as a deterioration of our relationship, I think that it’s just the way we are.

I don’t want him to feel like our relationship is falling apart, so I will do my best not to start arguments and not to continue them once they have begun.