get a better job

i got the offer.. and i said no. they were offering me more money, one grade higher than my current position and all the benefits of my current job… and i refused. i chose learning over money. staying is the biggest risk ive ever taken. Hope it pays off.

i want that job soo much thats all i think abt all day.. waiting for them to make the final selection..

havent received a call from that place yet.. man i want it sooo much it literally hurts.. i havent been working properly coz i want it soooo bad :(
Gave another interview at this other place .. im pretty sure i wont get it and i dont give care cuz i dint like the place at all.. but i hate getting rejected..

ok so i gotta second interview call from this place.. and i liked their office soo much, the stuff they told me abt the job, it all sounded so great.. i reealllly want this job.. just that interview alone made me realise how much i want to switch.. oh God if only i can have this job.. just this once give me this job.. pleassseeeeee

every day is a missed opportunity :(.
Havent done anyting in the past three days. Will sit late today to apply in places.

so the interview went okay. i wont say it was great.. i dont know what ppl think of me.. i can never tell.

i have an interview today and im coming down with a panic attack. its getting hard to breathe.

Need to do the following things to get a better job:
-Send my cv to head hunters
-send unsolicited cv
-look for better opportunities within the company
-look for jobs online/newspaper etc.

Will write my progress (whatever lil progress i make) on a daily basis. This is now a project.

i cry whenever i see this goal…when when??? when will i get a job i love??

i wonder if im ever gonna get a better job??