figure out what's wrong with me

accurate to “diagnose” yourself, but more and more I suspect I have an avoidant personality. I want to connect with people, but I simply cannot. Lately I feel like I have no personality, or no aspect of it worth showing to people. I feel like this black hole of miserableness. I’m convinced I come off as odd and people think I am weird and sad and they pity me, and it’s painful to realize.

I don’t know what is wrong with me that nothing ever goes my way. I can try, & try, & try, & try and still nothing.

I’m told I am a generally attractive & intelligent person. I can even be charming under the right circumstances. Of course I have flaws, but I don’t see how any of them are major enough to make me worse than any other flawed human being.

I mean, I know I am shy & can be reserved until I really feel comfortable with people (and the time on that varies), but there are plenty of shy people in the world who are not stuck like I am.
I wonder why no one wants me….as a friend, as a girlfriend, as a worker….I just feel totally worthless & I wonder what is so terribly WRONG with me.