Step out of my comfort zone

this has to do with going against the grain from what’s within myself. I don’t like to spend money and people accuse me of being cheap but the reason was I didn’t have money. I’m just on the cusp of being ‘average’ again and to kick it off I won’t be paying off my bills as fast as I could because I have a new car to pay for. Sort of backward but definately not something I would normally do.

Fortunately it only delays plans a couple of years and in our area you really need a functioning car. So why not?

A big part of the things I do is for instant gratification. The now, and it goes to giving to others. Doing this too long makes things worst because it not always productive as ‘work’.

I felt bad that I had to say no, but I know when the trust come she will understand that the immediate is no, but the yes I’m saying is way more important than the little things.

I’m from a technical background and I visited a artistic house full of skaters and artists. It would of been nice to connect with them but I found myself out of place. Would I do it again? It was a harmless interaction, I learned that people do live differently. I t definately felt homey. I just left the place not knowing what to say and yet again living off the tails of a much more social person than I.