let go of my anger

A lifetime of perceived slights? A few big (actual) slights? Honestly, enough is enough. I’m sick to death of being defensive, and quick to anger/slow to cool. It doesn’t make me a good husband, it doesn’t make me a good father, it doesn’t do me anything but harm. I’m not some raging asshole, but there’s this continual smoldering just below the surface. When I was younger, it was sadness… and now it’s anger, and it sucks. How do I let it go?