...to get your ravishing confidence on.
I’m currently living in a developing country and I have to say its a great place to get your ravishing confidence on. There are uttery no barriers to doing this. And because all of the cultures are all jumbled together in one big mess, people just let it roll over them. I let others personalities roll over mine and mine over theirs and if it works well then great and if not, well then we both just keep rolling.
It’s so liberating.
I think the balance is going much better. I’m saying no with confidence, and I’m sticking to my guns about having said no. I’m saying yes more too, and I’m enjoying having said yes to things I would normally have run away from.
I’ve had to let the nail polish go. But I miss it so much! I don’t think I’ll ever leave home again without a full mani/pedi kit. I’m kinda sick of feeling like I’m camping all the time. It’s time to take back my feminity! I’ve restocked the make up bag and it feels so good to be able to have all these beautiful little bottles around me.
I’m back in the gym which is great. Had a bit of a slip as there are lots of seedy guys who check you out all the time. It’s a bit ferral frankly and it made me feel really uncomfortable. So, it’s back at it tomorrow morning, even with seedy men. I’ve got music and a goal. The gym is my space and my time and they aren’t going to take my health from me!! (So there) Also I have to start training…there are a few mountains I have my eye on…
I’m also staring to work on my posture again. It’s been terrible these past few months. But I can feel myself standing up straight in my sleep (weird concept I know, but I am always so hunched when I sleep it can’t be helping my muscles relax and reform).
Reading so much more which is great. I’ve got myself into a positive evening routine that involves beauty products and reading. Bliss. I’ve also got a kindle (otherwise known as the best thin to happen to travel since travel). It’s so good. I can carry as many books as I like and I’m never without it.
I haven’t had my hair cut for over six months. I don’t think I trust anyone here near it. But…it is looking really good, if just a little dry. I will keep my eyes out for a hair mask when I’m somewhere that resembles more modern civilisation…(sounds mean but it’s really hard to keep any beauty up here and I sort of admire the women who can keep their make-up form sliding down their face).
I have also decided to get someone else to do my clothes shopping for me. I hate that much. But I am really looking forward to buying new underwear. I left all my nice stuff at home and I miss it so very, very much!
Most significantly, I didn’t let someone screw me over for a long time. I was able to identify what he was doing (using me as a proxy girlfriend while he was deciding if he wanted to stay with her, and I would be the nice landing if he decided to end it), and bail before I got too hurt. I got hurt because he was a friend and there aren’t too many people here so you can’t really get up in anyone’s face about anything really (you just have to let it roll). And I got hurt because I didn’t thin he would treat me like that. and I was hurt becuase I let him treat me badly for a short while. But I did stop it. And he knows why. So even though I started to walk down the negative path I know so very, very well I was able to turn back with a bit of grace and get the hell out of there! An achievement indeed.