get my own apartment

Well, I’ve begun cleaning up the computer area. Let’s hope I make steady progress.

Well, I successfully completed my cleaning goals for September.

laundry basketvideotape area

Now it’s on to the computer area and the area to the left of my bed.

I also need to follow-up on my credit card application status.

Let’s hope I’m as consistent in October as I was in September!

Well, I finished up cleaning the videotape area. I ended up throwing away a good deal of tapes, old computer program boxes, and sheet music. I have a hard time letting go of things; once I start looking through stuff, I can’t help but think about how I might want to keep it so I can use it every now and again. In the interest of actually making a dent in all the junk I have lying around, I’ve been trying to just chuck most of the stuff anyway. The only thing left are the things that I had on top of the laundry basket; they’re just sort of sitting there and I technically should take care of them before I consider myself truly finished with this month’s cleaning goals.

So:

videotape areaclean out laundry basket of junk

Left to do:

Go through the items that were on top of the basket. Then it’s on to next month’s goals!

I hate cleaning with a passion, so the fact that I’ve gotten this far is pretty good.

One aspect I forgot to mention in most of my previous posts was that of credit… I’d like to start establishing some, as that would better my chances of landing an apartment. In that vein, I followed up on the status of a credit card application I submitted and reapplied, as suggested, for a slightly different card. I’m supposed to hear back one way or another within a month or so. My next task would be to check up on the status 2 weeks or so from now.

If it weren’t for the fact that I think it might help me in my search for an apartment, I probably wouldn’t bother… I just don’t like the idea of credit, and the trouble it can get you into if you’re not careful. I prefer to pay knowing that if I do not have the available funds, I’m not going to be able to purchase whatever it may be. It’s just simpler than having to worry about going over your credit limit or getting tempted to spend beyond your means. To that end, if/when I finally do get accepted for a card, I plan to use it in a very deliberate way; perhaps simply for gas purchases, say. In other words, I will just be using the card to up my credit score… nothing more, nothing less—let’s hope!

And that brings me to two down (follow-up on credit application, Paris research), one to go (clean my videotape area) for September.

So I started on my videotape area yesterday. I threw away a good deal, including all of the stuff I recorded on blank tapes (which was quite something, because I’m such a pack rat). I figured it would be easier and more realistic to just toss it out instead of telling myself that I would look through it all and see if there was anything worth keeping. So now I have a few videotapes that I’d like to keep and a “not sure” pile. I do have a VCR, but rarely use it. So really, the “not sure” pile should probably be trashed as well, but I have some Björk, Radiohead, Sarah McLachlan, etc. stuff that I kind of want to keep.

So the next step would be to make final decisions regarding the videotapes and to organize what I do keep in a sensible manner. Then it’s on to the container of sheet music. And I have 2 – 3 VCRS in my room. I’ll probably want to trash all but one.

With that I would have completed part 1 of step 1: cleaning out my living quarters!

Laundry basket
Videotape area: started

So I’ve tried to break this thing up into month-by-month chunks.
This month I am supposed to clean out that laundry basket full of junk (that’s been in there for years), which I finished yesterday. I just need to throw out the trash bag. The next thing I need to do is clean up the area by my door, with the sheet music and videotapes.

Clean out laundry basket
Clean up videotape area

Seems so simple, but I really am the ultimate procrastinator. I’m sure that I could have cleaned up my room in a day or so if I just hunkered down and did it. I actually did clean up the bulk of my room a month or so ago, but there are still areas that need to be completed.

While I’m at it, some of the things that I’m looking forward to doing once I get my own place:

1. Cooking! Getting recipes from online and elsewhere, cooking old favorites and experimenting with new dishes. Then again, maybe I’ll miss the days when I didn’t have to cook for myself.

2. Less laundry! Only having to do my own laundry; not having to put aside 4 – 5 hours every Sunday.

3. Piano! Computer! Purchasing a new digital piano, computer, and music software; hooking the piano up to the computer and recording music. Actually starting on the many music-related projects I’ve been wanting to do.

4. Photoshop! Internet! Games! Free Internet access is another thing I’ll probably miss, but once I get access in my apartment, I won’t have to compete with 2-3 other people for computer time. I can surf to my heart’s content. Same thing with Photoshop—I can actually use it! I really haven’t done anything Photoshop related for quite a while because I don’t have enough computer time to really get into it. I have many projects I would like to pursue. As for computer games, one word: Oblivion. I have been able to play it a bit, but my own apartment means crazy all-nighters, if the mood hits me. If I wanted to I could get a GameCube or get a PlayStation 2 so I could play DDR (assuming my apartment was on the bottom floor).

5. No mood busters! Coming home happy and staying happy. Or if I come home unhappy, it’s not because someone else is in a bad mood. Not having to worry about other people’s moods, issues, isms or demands.

6. Doing things as I please! Living my life the way I’d like to live it without having to consider others’ opinions on the matter. Lack of money or time may get in the way, but not other people. I want to go out, I go out. I want to stay in and paint, read, draw, sing, dance, whatever, I do it. Could I paint now? Draw now? Sure, but I think having my own space would help.

7. Privacy! Having the place to myself; not having to cloister myself in my room for alone time. Not finding someone awake at all hours of the day and night. And just that feeling of knowing your own personal space is waiting for you after work. Coming home to my own apartment and knowing I have the place to myself.

8. Independence! Having the opportunity to see what sort of life I set up for myself. How will the place look? What sort of style will it have? Will I be able to keep it tidy? Will I stay in most of the time or will I be out all of the time? Will I have people over?

Now, to be fair, I’m sure there are things I will miss. Things I may not even give a second thought now. These might be:

1. Company. Who knows… maybe I’ll sometimes find coming home to an empty apartment lonely. And after you’ve watched a particularly scary movie, having other people around is a must.

2. Not having to worry about expenses, rent, etc. I’ll truly be on my own for the first time. Scary. I’ve never had to rely solely on my own income to support myself. I might find myself living like a pauper or barely scraping by. I might have to give up a lot of creature comforts. I may not have the money for the GameCube, the computer, etc. If I save up as much as I can now, I may be able to manage some of those things, but…. If things get tight or I run out of money, I’ll have to struggle my way through it. If anything goes wrong, I’ll be on my own. Can I hack it?

That is all that comes to mind for now.

Well, the steps involved in getting an apartment are something like this:

1. Clean out my current living quarters.
2. Work on establishing credit.
3. Establish a budget; what can I afford?
4. What sort of documentation will I need; letters of reference?
5. Apartment hunt; choose.
6. Pack, move.

I’m slowly moving through the first step. Yesterday I finished one of the two areas I’m supposed to clean out this month.

As for why this is an important goal… I would like to finally know what it is like to be independent. To live on my own, to truly establish and dictate my own lifestyle and way of life. Although I think that much of it is a question of mindset more than anything else (a lot of the things I want to do once I’m on my own I could be doing now), there’s no denying that getting out on my own would give me the privacy that I somewhat lack at this point. Not having to share space and resources (the computer, mainly!) would be great. Only having to account for and clean up after myself would be another bonus. Doing things my own way without unsolicited feedback would definitely be another. I almost feel that my true life won’t really begin until I take this step.

However, I am a born procrastinator, which is why I am trying to break up the process into workable steps so that I can move toward this goal.

In line with my tendency to procrastinate, there are several things that I have been wanting to do for a while now (purchases, projects, trips, etc.) but I keep telling myself that I should hold off until I get my own apartment. Well that’s fine, except that I’ve not made any real progress toward getting the apartment! A part of me wonders if it isn’t because of a fear of change and also a fear of having to fend for myself. After all, if I truly wanted to be on my own, I could have found a little apartment somewhere and done it, as so many people have before me. Then again, I tend to procrastinate regardless of the goal or the situation, so who knows….

At any rate, I have given myself until the end of January to accomplish this goal.