Get tested for learning issues

I was afraid I would learn there was nothing, that I was just me being me.

And now, I know: I have a non-verbal learning disability. I’m a classic case, apparently.

The testing reinforced weaknesses and cognitive quirks (and god, all the things I forget ) and seemingly simple things I can’t do that I have always known about but have never been able to justify – the curse of being “smart”. So, it’s not a blow to be told things I already know.

But it’s not something I can lean on—after all, it’s always been there. It is, however, something I can do something about now. Cognitive remediation (no, I’m not schizophrenic), here I come. (Though who knows where or when, since I am officially owned by my job.)

Since the beginning of February, I have been undergoing sessions of neuropsychological testing, a standard battery of tests to idenify possible cognitive impairments.

I am happy that Medicaid is paying for this, apprehensive of what the results will mean (or not mean), and I KNOW that I should be seeing a therapist, as the person doing the testing keeps telling me… thank you very much.

I’ve had some of this kind of testing in the past, and keep flashing back and meanning to write about it, and what it means.