keep in touch

My cousin let me know that her daughter’s cheer dance meet was in my neighborhood this weekend. So I met up with them there and then we went to lunch. For someone whose experience with cheer dance had been limited to watching Bring it On, it was an amazing spectacle. In addition to virtuosic lifts, tumbling and some kinda hoochie dancing, it was an exercise in incredible coordination that 30 or so girls could move around so vigorously and simultaneously in a relatively small area without anyone getting hurt. We only get together usually once a year or so, though we don’t live far. So it was super good to see them all in action.

for an old friend with whom I’d lost touch. I knew he’d moved with his family to Maine. At one time, we’d worked part time at the same oddball shop. Then, post job stayed in touch. Many years ago in another city, I went to Thanksgiving at his place. Though he never really does this kind of thing, he set me up with a friend of his (one of my best looking dates ever).

I just typed his name in. Not much came up, though he has a name that I’d think is fairly common. He was a carpenter, a builder of houses and a crafter of small exquisite objects. He had a dark sardonic wit wrapped in a quiet warm blanket of a southern voice. He was game for listening to eclectic music in tiny clubs and good at gifting. He was close with his brother. Dad to two girls, and slightly bewildered to find himself the lone male in the household. I can see his slight smile in my head – he looked friendly, but needed to spend a lot of time by himself.

Tried another search, adding some geography and using his full name and found his obit, with scant information, from 2005. What is the right way to describe, this delayed sadness now?

and I found time today to talk about family and what we’re thinking, worrying about re: our folks and their health. finally. I’m grateful we’ve opened up this line of communication.

to see old friends and their families. it’s spectacular to have a sense of who these kids are. hilarious and precocious variations on the people I know and love.

my aunt and uncle in the desert. they’re not getting any younger, as I was reminded by the many examples of different degrees and ways of aging encountered over the past couple of weeks.

and through out my growing up days (which appear to continue indefinitely) they have been unfailingly thoughtful. examples of aunt and uncle-hood to live up to.

to a place where there are maybe a dozen folks I’ve known in various ways over the years. Some I’ve been in great touch with, others, not so much. Not a reunion, but come to think of it, kind of like one.

There’s plenty stress in trying to figure out how to manage? juggle? all of the various degrees of in touch/out of touch. And feeling somewhere between – just closing my eyes and taking things as they come, and – making a concerted effort to coordinate quality time with those I need to spend time with.

I’m inclined toward the latter path. Here we go.

old classmate came through from Japan and had delightful dinner. An inspiration to be in better touch with those who are nearby too.

with super long time friend whom I haven’t seen in forever today.

And I’ve been intentionally planning meals with folks I don’t get to see routinely. Battling the barriers of busyness and traffic and transit and laze – which must be overcome!

On Saturday dinner with A – we hadn’t seen each other in months – was hilarious and informative, inspiring and perspective-creating. Plus we went to a completely hidden Korean place new to both of us and it was delicious – best pan chan evah!

my friend whom I haven’t heard from in years – has been sending them. On the one hand, wow, he’s been dealing with extreme drama in his family life and I’m grateful that he’s come to a point where he can share it. On the the other hand – I’m unsure about how to respond. He’s clearly grappling with extraordinary life events. I’ve let him know that I’m here, listening/reading and generally accepting. That’s what I can do for now.

are occasions to keep in touch, no? I guess that’s no big revelation, but my weekend has been one of babies, present and future. met up with old friends and their new baby. not that she’s got more time, with the newbie, but we’re going to try to take the opportunity to meet up weekly at yoga.

and old friend revealed – she’s expecting, with her new beau. phew. I’m afraid I might have seemed perfunctory with my congratulations – I’m happy for her, but a little worried. Another reason to stay in touch.