Try not to fall to pieces when Big one leaves for India

on Monday and stayed over at an airport hotel. We managed to spend our last night giggling instead of crying so that felt like a bonus.
Tuesday morning we caught the airport bus to Terminal 4 and held hands all the way. I was really struggling to keep the tears in but we managed to get to the check in desk and it was only when we were stood talking to another Project Trust kid and her mum that the tears started falling out of my eyes.
We had HUGE cuddles then is was time to wave her off through security. I’m not sure how many times we told each other we loved each other but then she was out of sight.
Then one of the other Mums lost it and was sobbing, I gave her a big cuddle and I think placating her stopped me from sobbing myself.
My eyes leaked on and off all the way back from London and last night I didn’t think I’d sleep but I think sheer exhaustion finally won as I did sleep.
Today I got a message from here that they had arrived safely. More tears.
But I did it, I got her off with a heart full of love and not a head full of worry. She’ll be fine, I’ll be fine, we’ll all be fine!

I’m physically and emotionally exhausted. I’ll come back and post properly another day.

for our overnight stop at Heathrow so we can wave Big one off. :(

I’m noticing more and more as the time is getting closer than Wee one may think she’s not enough for me with her sister leaving. This becomes more obvious when we meet people and they ask about Big one leaving and how will I cope. Wee one is quick to tell them “Mum’s still got me”
Today there was a side mutter from her “But I’m not Big one” :(