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Let God Lead…..

I have jumped into a new opportunity.  There are some specific details that need to happen, including the finances.   I am heading into the mist and hopefully will come out the other side headed right to where I'm supposed to be.   Just go forward and work hard to make it happen and any barriers fall away. So far so good.  Let God Lead..lGl

clothes

1. 4 pairs of pants (wool lined, khaki, black dress, jeans, )
2. 2 skirts. wool lined, dress
3. black dress.
4. 4 sweaters: 2 wool, 1 cadigan, blue sweater
5. 3 jackets 1 fleece, 1 raincoat, 1 down coat
6. wool tights, long underwear,
7. pjs- flannel
8. wool hat, gloves, scarf
9. hiking books, winter books, rain boots, sneakers, shoes, casual

1. 4 blank journals
2. 20 books.
3. yarn and needles
4. crayons/ markers, glue sticks , art paper.
5. batteries.
6. reading glasses.
7. pens.
8. candles.
9. bedding, flannel

personals
1. soap.
2. tooth paste.
3.

food
1. flour
2. sugar
3. brown sugar
4. cinnamon
5. yeast
6 . coffee
7 baking soda
8. nuts
9. oatmeal.
10. dried fruit.
11. dried hummus
12. oil.
13. black beans
14. sun dried tomotoes
15 dried pasta
16. popcorn
17.

Households
1. french press.
2. electric kettle.
3. cooking pots
4. knives
5. sponges
6. laundrey detergent
7.

other
1.recipes

I had to laugh the other day. I knew the answer, yet I asked it anyway. I’ve always had different taste in tv shows than my coworkers. More times than not.

My friends outside of work usually have similar tastes in tv shows/ movies. for the most part so I know that I’m not completely along. I have my people.

I was a work lunch the other day and we were talking about tv shows that were filmed in Hawaii. Bonty hunter (I’ve never heard of that show), Magnum PI, and may another one. I noticed they hadn’t mentioned LOST. one of my favorite all time shows. They alll looked at me said, LOST? what’s that? I’ve never heard of it. Oh that weird show. It made me laugh because I wasn’t surprised.
A little while later I talked about my new favorite show… Call the Midwife. they were like what? never heard of it . What tv network. I said PBS. huh? One person had heard of the shwo, but never watched it.

sign..
I think I’m a tv nerd.

I woke up tired this morning. dragged a little today, luckily nothing pressing… left by 3pm

Friend called to see if I wanted to go do something tonight I said no.

Got a call from a school district in rural Alaska for a teachingjob.. 9months of work, getting paid about 20k more than I make now. It’s rather appealing. I’d get 1 month off for Christmas and about 2 months for summer.

The adventure appeals to me and the position really fuels my passion for my work.

It’s far from my family. I’d still see them for christmas and even more time in the summer. but it’s far.

It’s this weird time for me. I am also up for aposition on the East Coast, The possible position is located about 10 minutes from my sister’s house. I don’t know if I am close to getting that job, it’s wild that is’ so different from thsi Alaska job.

the other job that is in the works is a different positon at my current agency . not as much money as the Alaska job or the NJ job,

I think if they all called tomorrow. It would probably go like this

1. Alaska job.
2. NJ job.
3 current place ment.

I think I want that Alaska job. I can save money, travel in the summer,

I also see how after 2 years, I can move into a regional director position and move back to the lower 48 ,and travel around to Alaska sites to do t/ta. It would be pretty cool.

Years ago i cut out an ad for a job, that was for a teacher, who taught school and traveled by bush plane to different villiage.s It always stayed with me. The pull is strong.

The NJ job,is interesting as wel. I feel like it would include picking with some lost relationshiops that I had 20 years ago. Moving back would be quite interesting, though, I kind of know I will nver quite fit into that place.

Staying where I am , with a new positon. could be interesting. New challlenges,. New director, whom I like a lot. could be good.

Aren’t I the lucky one. ? We’ll see. LGL.

Feb
Photography,
work transtion
book group
What’s next?
Gratitude
Lent?
Hildaguard
Creative expression
Board of directors
Advisory board
Salad club

Mar
Holy week
J’s funeral
What’s next?
forgiveness
opening
Volunteer Fair – great job.

April
Your love and your grace
work trip- nerves,
future possibilies
letting K know
acceptance
reunion
listening
LGL
community

May
LGL
Opening and possibliities
journey contiues with more joy vs happiness.
SEEL next year
new position possiblities.
hopeful

Love
Volunteer Fair
M
Hildaguar
Love and Grace
Easter brunch
photography
dance party
JVC brunch-LGL
renion talk
Jersey boys

not of love
doubt after b.
saying goodbye
unsettledness of COH

Hope in the world
M’s faith
reaching out of ET, JT, K, and friends
job possiblities.
hopeful

With the quiet return to a forgotten faith , intentionally showing up to everyday moments with God, through creativity, listening, and engaging in community , I have rediscovered a forgotten treasure. The bear bones of God’s love and grace, are resurrected again and I remember what’s important.

I’ve been doing great on my healthy diet. 5 fruits and veggies a day. whole grains, a lot less bread. Lean protien, walnuts, drinking water.

I just really really want some cake. Homemade Yellow cake with chocolate frosting, I will probably have a piece this weekend, but I just really love cake.

He’s kind of a mix between Joe Biden and Don Draper.

wow..reality hit yesterday..

Sequester hit home. I knew it meant that we’d hve to do staff reductions, one person’s positiion , yes, she’s extra..but they ask me for specific names of poeple yesterday We have to cut one more person.

Part of it about performance evals. It’s probablly going to be A. who has struggled to keep high attendance and high attendance with family. She has a write up.
She’s someone who parents really connect witha and staff connect with, but based on performacne it’s her. She is a single mom and has a very sweet little preschooler. It breaks my heart.

the other is M. Her files are so clean, but struggles with team work. and social skills. Performance wise she’s better than A. No write ups

V. has a write up , but it was long time ago. Things are solved and she’s done great.

O. would be another canidate. He’s never gotten offically written up. but is consistently late for meeting.

J. just started, transfered in from the center, she’s done great. I would hate to have her have to transfer back to center. She’s so good. but it might be easier for her to transfer to new position. I don’t want her to go, she’s great.

This is SO hard. I’m very anxious and ate crap for dinner and have been up all night.

Decisions need to happen soon.

We have some jobs opening up at another level, and I would like to appy for them. It’s not management, it’s traning and ta and data analyis I really want that job .

My prayer is that we can get through this wil intergrity and peace in my heart.
I also hope i get the other job , I’ll have to deal with this no matter what. I predict that we’ll make the job reduction announcement and give this person a month. So JUne 1st. Once that is complete, they will begin to announce the other positions that are opening for th eother grant,so that will be in June. I have a short vacaction in Jun thursday to Tuesday. Let’s hope it’s not a bad time to go away.

My heart is just aching as I make this decision.

What might save A. is that she is part of the project. We need her data.
It can’t be V. . It might be A. but she’s worked so hard. I don’t know!!!
K

I had a very moody day yesterday, that left me feeling really down and sad. I want today to hopeful and positive . I want to feel better.

1. go back to bed. It’s 430am and I don’th ave to up for 2 more hours.
2. eat the oatmeal for breakfast. fruit , healthy lunch and dinner.
3. drink water.
4. meditate for 20 minutes.
5. take a walk at lunch or go to the gym.
6. go to bed early. limit screen time to 2 hours (call the midwife and check email.
7. apply for the boston job. if not today, tomorrow.

8. LGL

Looking on Linkedin.
found a person I did a 3 month project with during graduate school. I found her one of most horrid, juvenile people I have ever worked with in my entire carreer. Someone who would make fun of the people we were serving. Disrespectful to anyone that was different thatn her. A gossip queen. How does she get to be senior management / change management at a large NYC firm?

Unbelievable. Am I missing something?