stop being a hypochondriac

I think the trick to this is to tell yourself “I’m bored with being a hypochondriac. It’s so common.” Try to cultivate an inner English butler voice in which to say it. He can say other things, too, like “that’s not a tumor, it’s a collarbone.” (Think: “it’s not a cookie, Mother, it’s a Fruit Newton.”)

It seems to be working for me.

true to form, things are going well in my life and so the probable tendonitis in my right elbow has magically turned into cancer, in my mind.

...i’ve noticed that i really only start poking for tumors when my life is going well, because i expect something bad to happen. in the absence of imagined tumors on my own body, i start looking for them on the cat, who usually bites me. when bitten, i try and remind myself of what i am doing, and then i start worrying about getting cat bite fever.