have fun and enjoy my life

It’s been a long time since I’ve been on this site. Somehow coming back from my trip I wanted to stay in that ‘away’ feeling. And maybe I just wanted to take a vaction from goal setting and seeking. It’s summer and it feels great to simply stand outside in the sunshine.

I missed everyone here and I liked being away too. Updating my goals were becoming a chore, something that I felt obliged to do, and going away made me realize that it was okay to take it easy and not be in the struggle all the time.

So, I’ve been away and I may be away on an off this summer, or maybe from now on. I don’t know. I love this community and the positive place this site holds for me. There’s a way to do all of this – have fun and get to the top of the mountain – without trying all the time. Something in me needs this break.

As this goal dictates: I’m off to have fun and enjoy my life.

All of my hopes and dreams converge at this goal. Out of whimsy I imagined myself being all the things that I’ve ever longed for: a sense of total belonging, wealth, etc., and I saw a vision of myself being completely at ease in the moment and enjoying my life.

It was a great image of me just Being.

So far it seems my mother is more excited about our upcoming trip to Honolulu and Tokyo. She’s searching the internet for things to do and eagerly planning our activities. It was my idea that we each list the things that we to do during our trip, and yet, I haven’t done much research. Partly I like the spontaneousness of travelling and getting lost in a city, but I know the merits of planning too.

Maybe I just can’t believe that I’m going back to Tokyo and that I’m going to be on a warm beach in two weeks’ time. Hawaii’s been floating around in my mind for awhile now and I told a friend recently that if I could do anything I’d fly off to Tokyo in an instant. And then my mother calls to invite me on this trip, which leaves me dazzled and amazed.

I’m going to give it my all in enjoying this and being grateful for my mother. Anyway, I just bought a new, sexy bikini that demands fun and enjoyment. So off I go into this new place of happy and joy.