be grateful

could have been pretty terrible whatwith all the unresolved stuff and possile awkwardness and missing loved ones far away. But friends, here and off 43T, sent emails and letters and gifts and plinked and chatted and skyped and superpoked and thought of me and lifted toasts both virtually and for real. And so the reality of this Christmas, though… somewhat blue and quiet and frustrating… was infinitely better than I had feared.

I’m so grateful for all the love and friendship and caring that has come my way this holiday season. People are good.

apartment. Bliss.

I hate being cold, and shivering on the sofa last night in four sweaters made me remember why I used to have “have a luxurious bohemian life” as a goal.

Giant peaches. Treasure Island. Friends I can talk to at 4 am. The staggering inventiveness of the stuff in the Sky Mall catalogue. The internet working like a dream in the apartment. The rocking Obama doll at Wallgreen’s. The sun soon about to rise. The promise of the good things yet to come.

Friendship. Cocktail bars. Aeroplanes. One store in Bohemia having an external power source so that I can watch movies on the iPod Touch in the plane though the battery just broke. My personal workout music DJ. All the wonderful things already planned in Chicago. The lights being turned on again in the world. Grant-giving organizations. The kindness of strangers. Kindness as such. Hope.

yesterday when, just as the doors were closing, a rather unsavoury looking young man with an open beer bottle in his hand wedged himself between the doors. ‘Great’, I had time to think, ‘an aggressive drunk will enter our already jam-packed carriage. Yay.’

He did not enter – he was just holding the door open for an old lady who had trouble moving, and with some pain and discomfort to himself. It made my day. I love being proved wrong when I’m narrow-minded and limited.

just now on 43T – no matter how many cheers I gave, I still had seven left.

I’m sure there’s a metaphor lurking there.

My bounty is as boundless as the sea,
My love as deep; the more I give to thee,
The more I have, for both are infinite.

days like yesterday – Breakfast Martinis at brunch, a reception at the Hedgehogia City Hall, drinks at a sunny terrace bar high high up with a view of the blue sea, and a wonderful dinner with colleagues around Europe who are also friends – make up for a lot of general academic misery. I’m a dashed lucky woman, I am.

working as a lecturer in Fabulousness Studies is today, and I got my last salary – there’s an extra holiday bonus _{or something} that I hadn’t counted on but that is very welcome right now.

most bold, most scary friend is back in Bohemia and yesterday I talked with her for almost two hours on the phone. She’s generally the bad cop to my good cop, but yesterday, as I filled her in on what has been going on since we last met in April, she was all good cop. I have been pretty heartbroken this month, and I’ve never witnessed her be more gentle or understanding or supportive. She assured me I’ll live. I’m very grateful for her friendship.

I’ve never met in ‘real life’ and who lives an ocean away did something wonderful, insightful and generous for me last week. I’m filled with gratitude for that and for having people like her in my life. Thanks, Ti.