Ask for help when I need it

to come over to my place Saturday and help me with some yard work – we have this steep riverbank that needs to be cleared of brush.

They’re both coming. We’re going to feed them some chili and beer for their troubles.

I’ve been stewing about this for a while, then realized I ought to ask my friends for some help in the form of advice.

My boss wants my desk/cubicle. A few months ago, the Big Boss moved his office, so now I’m sitting right outside his door. My boss now wants to sit near the Big Boss’ office, so he’s asked me to move to another open cubicle in the office. I don’t really want to move. I’ve been in this spot almost 10 years, it’s in the corner so I’m able to use bookcases on the wall behind me, and one of my best friends sits next to me. The new cubicle is near some other folks I like, but has less privacy and less space.

My boss and I have been back and forth over this several times over the last two months about whether I’d move. For a while, I thought he’d decided not to move, but then two weeks ago he told me he was moving me because he needed more privacy. He also said it would be good for me to move because he wants me to sit next to a new person they’re hiring. Our job duties overlap somewhat, and I’d actually been pushing for more responsibility in being able to supervise the new hire, thinking it might lead to a raise. So I agreed to move.

Yesterday my boss and I talked again about me training the new hire, who starts Monday. When I asked about what our responsibilities would be, he said we’d each have our own areas, though we could fill in for each other. That’s a far cry from the team approach I’d been pushing for, with me taking the lead. He also asked me when I’d be moving, and I said I haven’t had time, since I’ve been doing both jobs for the last month and a half.

I don’t think there’s any way around moving now, but since he didn’t give me the additional responsibility I wanted, I’m trying to figure out what else I can bargain for. I know I’m not coming from a position of strength here, but I’d like to get something for my trouble. Maybe a company cell phone or a better computer. My boss is generally a good guy (one of the better ones I’ve had actually), so I don’t want to hurt our relationship.

I’d appreciate any advice I can get. Thanks!

A close elderly relative is having some strange memory/cognition problems. The docs haven’t figured it out yet, but they’re just getting started. And I’m wondering if any of my subscribers have heard of anything like this.

He’s 85 and married for nearly 50 years, but all of a sudden he doesn’t recognize his wife. He knows he’s married to a woman named R, but when he looks at R, he doesn’t recognize her as his wife. He recognizes his children and other in-laws. He remembers things that he and his wife did together many years ago, but he for some reason there’s just a disconnect – a partial amnesia.

He may have recently bumped his head on a cabinet door, but we’re not certain. The family doc did extensive bloodwork, but all tests came back normal. They haven’t done any scans yet.

Anybody have any ideas?

I’m not big on asking for help when I need it.

Maybe I feel some of my problems are so unique that nobody else would understand. This is especially true with my wife’s health issues.

Maybe I feel I’m unworthy of receiving help.

Maybe I feel I should be strong enough or smart enough not to need help.

Maybe I’m afraid to appear vulnerable.

But I need to reach out to people, especially those who I know care about me, when I could use a hand.