2cimanp

Hey Guys. Please give me encouragement. I’ve been going through some of the most extremely difficult times in my life.

I hope things will get better, even if it’s a slow progress.

I’ve come to a point in my life where I finally realized that after so many years, I have made and gotten away with big lies. I don’t make too many lies but the few that I do make are big. These lies have always came at a huge price and left huge scars in me that never heal. I lie because I always fear for my self-image, I fear becoming embarassed and humiliated by people who don’t give a damn, many times I don’t think before I speak and I always feel pressured by others to lie. I lie because I want to cover up my true self. People lie to me all the time so I feel compelled to do the same. Recently, I ran into an acquaintance and I lied to him that I was currently still working at some company that I don’t work for when in fact I have been unemployed for seven months. The truth is I can’t find a job. YOU SEE HOW SELF-CONSCIOUS I AM!!! The last company I worked for, I lied to them that I found a new job when in fact I quit working with them because I felt mistreated, underappreciated, cheated and couldn’t handle their stupid immature internal unproffesional backstabbing politics. I’ve lied so many times to my family and friends too because I though it would save my ass. I’ve told SOOO MANY unecessary lies throughout my life and I believe that is why I am so hurt and life is so very tough for me right now. I WANT TO CHANGE THIS. Please don’t lie, because there is nothing you can do to cover it. Anyone reading this, thanks, because I’m glad to get this huge weight off of my chest and I can breathe again.