As I get older I realize that I do not know every aspect to every situation and that I need to hold my tongue. In the situations of defending myself I find that others often do not know my situation nor do they care to-they only care about telling others what to do/say etc.
I have found that instead of holding my tongue completely when I should defend myself I either word things in a way that makes the interrogater reflect on themselves. This in turn makes them more miserable with themselves and less likely to give me unwanted advice and such.
Does it work? Yes.