Beginnings Here

Welcoming 2013 with Open Arms! Here we come!



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Make 2012 the finest year of my life. (read all 7 entries…)
I just made either the best decision or the worst of my year

I was stuck in a place of limbo for the past couple of years. On a key issue affecting my time, priorities, and energy.

This past week, I reipped the bandaid off and I will now bleed to death or mend and be better than ever. Interesting how you can never be sure about which it will be. Science says, you will mend, so what was your worry in the first place? However, it doesn’t stop us from believing we are not well enough in some way to allow the science to succeed.

This will open the door, I hope to make my 2012 the finest year of my life. They keep getting better. I am very happy about that.



Make the list of adult functions for my daughter to understand what is coming and to prepare by taking on several things each year to prepare for adulthood (read all 5 entries…)
i searched for this list online

what i got was life skills based on those with handicaps and what expectations were for living life independently. Not. though interesting and useful as a low bar guideline.

then i found a few articles on what was know as “emerging adulthood” as a new category of life, like childhood or adolescence. Interestingly, my daughter will be considered an emerging adult for a decade. really?

i felt the same way, but i wasn’t given training wheels. I was out on my own, needing to figure it out and not having a clue, but learning quickly!!

if there was a victory, while she was home over the holidays and she realized how often she had to turn to me for money, she realized how reliant she is on me for everything. at school, those things are provided and with her job (and a monthly budget from me) she has some spending money. While home, I think she realized how fast the money was flying out, for gifts, travel, trips, meals, clothing and I think she finally realized how much it all is. At least she mentioned it.

I think learning how to pay for yourself, and live within your means is the most adult thing there is to learn.

If you want a certain lifestyle, you must figure out how to financially afford that lifestyle. This includes “growing up” and realizing what the adult world values, even if we don’t. I think learning about the value system, the economic system and how to bring value while reconciling that with your own values is an important part of growing up.

There is much to learn, always about life. Especially when the rules change and we live in such a destabilized time.

Life is more complex. Because the pace is so fast. It does take longer to learn how to walk through it all. But how to learn how to do that: just doing it is learning. Experiential learning. Preparation beforehand. Guidance while learning.



Make the list of adult functions for my daughter to understand what is coming and to prepare by taking on several things each year to prepare for adulthood (read all 5 entries…)
i searched for this list online

what i got was life skills based on those with handicaps and what expectations were for living life independently. Not. though interesting and useful as a low bar guideline.

then i found a few articles on what was know as “emerging adulthood” as a new category of life, like childhood or adolescence. Interestingly, my daughter will be considered an emerging adult for a decade. really?

i felt the same way, but i wasn’t given training wheels. I was out on my own, needing to figure it out and not having a clue, but learning quickly!!

if there was a victory, while she was home over the holidays and she realized how often she had to turn to me for money, she realized how reliant she is on me for everything. at school, those things are provided and with her job (and a monthly budget from me) she has some spending money. While home, I think she realized how fast the money was flying out, for gifts, travel, trips, meals, clothing and I think she finally realized how much it all is. At least she mentioned it.

I think learning how to pay for yourself, and live within your means is the most adult thing there is to learn.

If you want a certain lifestyle, you must figure out how to financially afford that lifestyle. This includes “growing up” and realizing what the adult world values, even if we don’t. I think learning about the value system, the economic system and how to bring value while reconciling that with your own values is an important part of growing up.

There is much to learn, always about life. Especially when the rules change and we live in such a destabilized time.

Life is more complex. Because the pace is so fast. It does take longer to learn how to walk through it all. But how to learn how to do that: just doing it is learning. Experiential learning. Preparation beforehand. Guidance while learning.



January Bootcamp 2012: Fresh Starts and New Aspirations (read all 3 entries…)
this is a great list i have co-opted.

Eat healthy ✔ juiced, avocado, homemade healthy dinner
Do yoga ✔ yesterday and sauna
Walk daily ✔ no, but a great goal
Sunshine daily ✔ sat in the sun for a couple of hours
Practice gratitude ✔ to a few folks today. and for the day.



Rabbit trail an afterwork ritual of health, hearth and home (read all 2 entries…)
hearth...how to make a cozy space

start lighting all those damn candles I have all over the place.

start using my fireplace.

start reading at night.

invite people over. create a theme night…mmmm….like… spa night or indulge in your favorite truffle night … or learning how to make truffles… or pizelles or whatever….get my kitchen going.



Rabbit trail an afterwork ritual of health, hearth and home (read all 2 entries…)
what would that trail look like?

pre-dinner if needed: smoothie or juice

First: Make dinner with raw ingredients.
Second: While dinner is cooking, pick-up and dust the living/work space EVERYDAY!

Third: You must move!! walk, gym, bike, yoga, quick 8, windmills, dance, anything! But move your butt.



Help my mother in ways I have never imagined I could. Find a way! (read all 10 entries…)
I brought her a New Years Eve Dinner

And lots of treats. Set up her new Keurig that I got her for Christmas – that she was debating keeping. Brought her granddaughter over for a visit. Just shot the breeze with her. Talked. About everything and nothing. And then, left in a timely manner so that she could relax and get her sleep.

I really have enjoyed the opportunity to come to terms with her. Say goodbye over the past year. While celebrating the fact that she is alive.

We finally get to hug. we were never a family of huggers. But now we hug. That is a really great victory, come to think of it. What a change over the last year. We really have made a lot of progress.

Yea! that is a way.



follow the 13 key questions to ask before i design, specify, or buy anything (read all 2 entries…)
Found them on a cohorts page. thank you. these are wonderful?

Here they are:
01 Do we need it?
02 Can we do without it?
03 Can we borrow, rent or get it used?
04 Is the project/product designed to minimize waste?
05 Can it be smaller, lighter or made from fewer materials?
06 Is it designated to be durable or multi-functional?
07 Does it use renewable resources?
08 Is reuse practical and encouraged?
09 Are the product and/or packaging refillable, recyclable or repairable?
10 Is it made with post-consumer recycled (PCR) or reclaimed materials and how much?
11 Is it available in a less toxic form? Can it be made with less toxic materials?
12 Is it available from a socially and environmentally responsible company?
13 Is it made locally?



follow the 13 key questions to ask before i design, specify, or buy anything (read all 2 entries…)
i don't know what they are, but it seems like a great idea!

what are the 13 key question to ask before I design, specify or buy anything?



Celebrate my successes in positive ways (read all 10 entries…)
I promised S and now we will

I must come up with a great way to celebrate the year we had in my business.

friday this week. party. holiday year whiteboarding.

accomplishments. successes. lessons learned.

more.



Blaze a new rabbit trail in 2011 (read all 5 entries…)
in some ways, I did. in others...not so much

Wait until 2012! new rabbit trail. to come.



Attend lectures and readings occasionally (read all 2 entries…)
Henry came to town

Because I was in the middle of reading his new book, “On China”, I attended his lecture. Even with the protesters at the door, it was worth hearing what he has to say in retrospect and for today. Kissinger.



In the depths of winter I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer (read all 2 entries…)
As we have plunged into the long, dark days of winter

...and every year I struggle to find my way through the darkness and past it once again, it mimics the journey the soul life takes on each year, finding the joy and gratitude in the darkest moments life offers. I can find a way to make this live within me, to find those parts of me that so deeply want to live, thrive and be. happy? sad? just to feel and know i have lived. to be in the moment. to live. to experience what there is to be offered in a lifetime. the range. the trite. the expected. the unexpected…all coming at you to respond, react, repeat, relearn… love. what is it? where does it come from? who demonstrates it? often from the furthest reaching places. strangers who can be so kind. caring. getting harder to find – but only if you believe that is true. look with both eyes. see the good and the bad. see with eyes that find the path to your happy ending.



Convert the backyard into a greenhouse for veggies and fruits (read all 2 entries…)
i want to buy the place first...but next year - in the fall of 2012 will get started.

this would make the space really wonderful. privacy, too.



Ask: are there any narcisists I am enabling? (read all 10 entries…)
a weekly reminder on this has had me laughing all year

Just when I am about to step in it again, my weekly reminder would hit and there my answer would be. Maybe I should make this a daily reminder!!!

I enable narcissists all the time!!! I have changed the pattern this year – but only because of the reminders.

Moreover, I am in a relationship with one!!! Yikes! What was I thinking? I realized it the last fight we had. He is never going to see the real me. He is seeing me through his narcissist view of the world. NVOTW. :)

It is all about you – baby.

All about you!!

I am learning. How to see things. Open your eyes!!!

You are not blind. Just very dumb on what normal looks like. Your normal is not normal. It was a very sick normal that you fight everyday to find your way…and teach yourself to find your new normal. In the meantime, he is unhappy because you aren’t doting on him – all the time!

Open your eyes. I thought I was blind. Open your eyes. I know I was blind.



make a home (read all 18 entries…)
Incredible twist

I’m buying my house. I have been renting. Now I am buying it. It will truly be my home.



buy a building which houses my work and life by 2012 (read all 9 entries…)
While searching, I found a hilltop site -

3 acres with 2 very run down properties…

a pool, hot tub, etc… it is like a mini-spa if only it were fixed up.

very run down. 1950’s and not a dime of investment since.

but it calls me. it lives in me now.

we’ll see.

way too much, but negotiable.



have a 6 month emergency fund (read all 4 entries…)
should be around forty eight

half of that would keep me in pain.

but for three months.

ultimately, i need twelve months in case something comes up.



Daughter's Spring Break, College Visits, Graduation, Summer Trips, College Launch, Christmas Break (read all 7 entries…)
christmas break may be a bust.

we’ll see. not happy on the options.

think differently. ok? maybe it will be a wonderful break.



Blaze a new rabbit trail in 2011 (read all 5 entries…)
Blazing a new trail...

Not in the way I had hoped, but a different trail.

Life is definitely different. The trail is changing.

Perhaps being pushed out of my trail now.

Could be a really good thing.



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