BtchenBernie

Ummm…does that count? I can’t drink milk even if I want to, I get sick.

It’s weird to see people here denouncing drinking milk when sometimes I wish I could just drink a regular glass of milk without puking or going to the restroom.

I guess the cliche is true, It’s always greener on the other side.

I’m quite insecure with how my body looks. I’ve been quite “good” in a sense that I lost about 15 lbs of unwanted weight, I can actually fit into a size 3 jeans and extra small shirts, but I still look in the mirror and say UGH!

Maybe if I get to pose nude artistically for a photographer who I completely trusts and will make me feel like I’m the hottest girl on earth, JUST MAYBE I’ll start accepting my body. Maybe then I’ll say “Well, I don’t look that bad.”

I think I came up with more than a 100…oh well

A cup of steaming hot chocolate/tea/coffee
watching a sunset or a sunrise
a starry night
fall/ autumn
watching clouds go by
finding shapes in clouds
reading a really good book
watching at/listening to the raindrops/thunderstorms
warming up around a roaring fire esp. when it’s really cold
walking in those nature/park trails and beaches
sun in your face
laying out in the beach
listening to the crashing of the waves
staying in a beautiful remote island without the trappings of civilian life (this is amazing!)
collecting seashells/ pretty stones along the shoreline
listening to my favorite songs (for some reason Sugarcult’s Memory makes me really happy)
listening to an amazing singer live
singing in choir
practicing karaoke inside my car esp. when no one is around
choir practices
dress rehearsals
nervous energy before the performance
rocking out with my high shool friends (used to)
hanging out with my close group of friends anywhere
DANCE (all forms)
grooving to my favorite song on full-blast inside my car while driving not caring what other drivers think
dancing when no one is watching
slow dancing without music with my boyfriend (even if I’m on tippy-toes)
conversations with my favorite people
all night gabfest and talking about nothing
unexpected, random, amazing conversation with a total stranger you’re never going to see again
cross-stitching/knitting
driving
going on a road trip with no predetermined destination
preparing for a trip
being in a trip
airports
waiting for your flight so you people watch/write stuff in your journal/watch airplanes arrive and depart
Bed and breakfasts
visiting historic places
visiting museums
getting engrossed in an art piece
hanging out with my nuclear family
unexpected correspondence from somebody you haven’t heard from in awhile
the fact that I’m still bestfriends with Sean
receiving love letters/poems/songs
writing love letters/poems
kisses
bear hugs
cuddling
massages
feeling safe with someone you care for
staring into the eyes of someone you really care
soft gentle caresses as if you’re a very delicate flower (always gives me shivers)
waking up next to somebody you care about
sleeping in/all day esp. next to someone you love
the first realization that you are inlove (you look at them and think, “Oh, my God, I’m inlove with you!)
the feeling of being in love
recalling a fond memory
browsing through books in a bookshop (I leave a completely different person)
window shopping
wanderig around aimlessly in a cool, quaint neighborhood
discovering a really good restaurant/coffe shop/store etc.
eating a butter pecan/pistachio ice cream in a waffle cone
laughing at an inside joke
laughing so much and so hard you start crying
watching my favorite films/ TVshows
hot jacuzzis
swimming in the pool/beach with no one else around wearing next to nothing
taking a really long hot shower/bubble bath
the fresh clean feeling after you get out of the shower
slathering myself with my favorite lotion after shower and taking time doing it
getting dolled up for a special event
getting a manicure/pedicure from my favorite salon
getting an awesome haircut/color from my favorite hairstylist
makeovers
shopping for clothes/shoes
getting unexpected presents
buying presents for somebody just because
seeing the look in their face when they open said presents
reading back entries on my journal esp my paper journal (it amazes me how different I feel/think on various days)
eating food I’ve been craving
baking cookies/cupcakes/cakes
experimenting on recipes and it actually comes out good
cooking a complete meal
people actually liking and finishing out the meal I’ve prepared
a chilled, shaken martini
dark, semi-sweet chocolates
french fries with chili cheese
drinking an excellent wine
receiving random, unsolicited, unexpected compliments
meditating
being a kid for a day
spinning in circles until it makes you lightheaded and dizzy
weddings (they make me cry)
babies
pets
picking flowers in garders/strawberries in the farm
receiving flowers (as long as it’s not red roses, I hate red roses)
watching farm animals go do their day
smell of freshly mowed lawn
smell of earth after a light shower
smells of incense/flowers/freshly baked bread/mango/pineapple
burrowing my head in my man’s arms and smelling his clean natural smell without cologne
the smell when you walk in the Abercrombie and Fitch stores (it reminds me of Sean)
sleeping naked
walking around naked in my house when no one’s around and the blinds are drawn closed
shocking people and having a laugh at it later
fishing
deep husky voices in men (very sexy)
watching hunky men
flirting back and forth with an attractive, sexy, intelligent man
finding out that you still got what IT takes
unexpected booty slaps from people I like (only from people I like and feel safe with)
having a whole day to myself to do what I feel like doing