CitizenAim

I participated in a 5k at a nudist park. I did find it liberating but I’m somewhat young (24), female, and I guess attractive and felt like I was getting a lot of unwanted attention from older men, which made the entire experience feel overly sexual. I’m glad I did it because it’s made me feel more confident but at the same time, I really would not go back to one alone. At least not while I’m still young. Running naked really feels great though.

I quit my job and got a new one. Luckily, I was qualified and in-demand enough to be able to do this in the course of a week and now I’m somewhere where in my spare time, I can think about how necessary I am at my job rather than worry that I’m going to be fired because of things that are beyond my control. No job should ever be that stressful.

I was thinking about this the other day.

Three years ago, this guy I was dating (long distance relationship) came to visit me and we went on a trip out of state in my car. While gone, my car endured some weird problems and of course, my new, never-used before credit card was declined when I had to pay $450 to an auto repair center. So of course, my then-boyfriend steps up to the plate and pays, expecting to be paid back.

We then broke up a month later and I still owe him $200. We haven’t spoken in over two years. I don’t even have his address. He lives over 1000 miles away. I have no idea how I COULD pay him back but I sometimes remember it and feel very guilty and know that I should because $450 is a significant chunk of change.

I don’t want to pay him back because of any sentimental feeling towards him. I just know I’ll feel like an overall asshole in general if I don’t ever do it. Mostly because this guy went through a HARD time financially a few months down the road and needed every penny he had.

I have no idea how well he is doing today, but well, I have no desire to talk to him ever again. I just want to pay him back. And maybe say I’m sorry for taking so long.