DarwinsChild

I borrowed this book by Susan Jeffers, PhD at the public libary. It is pretty good. One of the things I am coming to realize is that despite all the great things going on in my life and all my accomplishments so far, I don’t have much faith in myself, so now, whenever I start to think I can’t handle something, I stop myself right away and think, “I can handle it!”

Hopefully, there will be a day when I don’t have to tell myself this and will just automatically assume it is true. By then, I will have this internalized :)

I have made up my mind to take an MCAT class this summer, so no more sitting on my butt to figure out when I am going to do this. It is going to happen in May! I am trying not to put too much pressure on myself to take the MCATs immediately after I finish the test prep class, although I know that is what most people do.

I find it is best to look at this one project at a time. First, finish up my resume and essays for grad school, sign up for an MCAT class, work superhard on it, and then, if I feel ready, take the damn test and get it over with!!

On another note, my mom and I are beginning to see eye-to-eye on a few things. The idea of my leaving the country for a few months to do volunteer medical work is not throwing her into a state of sheer anxiety. Either she is seeing that I am growing up or my mom is just getting too old and tired to say no :)

1. Overcome my fear of appearing dumb or incompetent (There really is no getting around this one—at one point or another someone is going to think they are brighter or more articulate than I am, so I might as well learn to start living with myself now.)

2. Stop holding myself back from taking more risks—This year, I am slowly learning to take more intellectual and social risks. I went out on my first coffee-date. Weird, I am 22 years old and am just beginning to learn what this all means.

3. Stop worrying if people don’t like me. I am convinced that 99.9% of the men in this world do not have to worry about this. Why then should I? As long as I learn to like myself, then all will be well with this world.

4. Stop the self-flagellation

5. And be more other-directed