Dreamer7787

So I really haven’t been doing good with this goal recently. A lot of things have been weighing on my mind making me more than a bit negative. They say that life isn’t a fairy tale and it’s true. The people we think are flawless turn out to have just as many flaws as us. Feelings get hurt. Things get said that can’t be unsaid. And yet life goes on. Relationships are rekindled after the flames have all but gone out, but how to you undo the pain that took place?

They say time. I guess I don’t have the patience for time. I want something that heals now.

There are people I have a right to be angry with and I am. But there are people in this whole situation who don’t deserve my anger. They had no idea what was going on. But I still dwell on it. I still blame them. I still feel awkward and negative when they’re mentioned and when I “see” them. I worry about the day I have to face them in public and can’t figure out how I’m supposed to act. It drives me insane.

Words that were said at times drowned out the good words and good things happening now. I try not to dwell. I see myself thinking about them and remind myself that they’re in the past now. We’re happy now. Happy than we’ve ever been (except within the honeymoon stage). Actually it’s more like we’re having a second one. Relearning things about each other. Talking more. Sharing our feelings on issues that we probably would have kept silent about before and while sometimes it leads to some heated conversations at the end of the day we still end up in each others arms.

So my question is how to stop the negative? How to focus on the good instead of the bad that came before? The bad’s in the past. It can’t be changed. It can’t be undone. Remorse had been shown and forgiveness given to those who have shown it. But there’s still a long way to go in healing the holes.

Here’s to getting my butt back into motion on this goal.

On my way to achieving this goal. Adam and I recently purchased out Kissing Bridge season passes! :) Sooooo excited! We got the pass that let’s us go once a week on any night of our choosing. We figure one night is really all we’re going to need. Life after all is hectic and snowboarding is one hell of a work out.

Hopefully we’re going shopping soon to finish getting all our gear. I still need a helmet and goggles (and of course Spyder snow pants lol). Adam needs new boots because his like to eat his feet in unpleasant way.

Very excited and hopefully it helps with my getting in shape plan! :D

So I probably should stop reading the Harry Potter books and focus on my two YA books a week that I have to read, but… I don’t feel like it. :P

My favorite character is finally in this book!! Yay! :)

While reading this I really wished I could go back and read it the same way I originally did, before I knew what the future of the character was going to be. I wonder how I reacted to this character twist or this plot twist before I knew it was coming. Reading the books is great a refreshed and entertaining, but it’s not as entertaining because I know what happens now. I know that this character becomes this so there isn’t that first time excitement. Nothing I can do about that but it would be interesting to be able to see what I thought back then. lol

On to book four: HP and the Goblet of Fire. Wooo! It’s going to suck to carry this book around in my purse. :P