Hecate_621

I was going to respond to Kaley’s comment – but I realized it was turning into it’s own entry :)

My appointment got delayed a month, so I won’t start the hormone testing till mid-July. (My doctor was out sick, then is going on vacation)

My previous doctors explained the process a little to me.
These are the steps that were outlined, if one step fails we move to the next.
1. Lose weight and/or maintain a healthy weight. This includes a very well balanced diet. (done!)

2. Try Glucophage (metformin). This is a drug that is usually prescribed to people with type 2 diabetes. It helps your body regulate it’s insulin. Most women with PCOS have some blood sugar problems. They think PCOS is caused by your body’s resistance to insulin.
- I have tried this before, and it gives me HORRIBLE side effects. Although I do have a blood sugar problem (Hypoglycemia, low blood sugar – the exact opposite of diabetes.) it can usually be maintained by a good diet and exercise. I would be willing to try this again but it didn’t work the first time.

2. Clomid – it’s the safest of fertility drugs. It basically helps you ovulate. It’s often used with Glucophage. 90% of PCOS women use this without problems. Within the first 6 months they become pregnant.
- This I am willing to try. Although the risk is greater for ovarian cancer with fertility medications, it’s so minimal. The best thing you can do to avoid ovarian cancer is to be pregnant. In my case, where there are cysts hanging out on my ovaries, I’m already at a pretty good risk for it. The minimal amount of risk that comes with Clomid is worth it for the major reduction that comes with pregnancy.

3. IVF – This, I am not sure I want to even try. I want a baby, without a doubt, however the cost of IVF, the heartache and the amount of hormones and medications I would have to be on to be artificially inseminated is just too much. At this point I may just stop and accept never carrying a pregnancy to term.

4. Surrogate mother – A friend of ours, who absolutely loves being pregnant has offered this for us. She gave a baby up for adoption when she was 18, and has since had three children of her own.
She would emotionally be the perfect surrogate. She loves giving birth, she’s a close friend, and she would be able to give the child to us with minimal emotional harm to herself.
However she really only has one year left for this for her own sake as well as the child’s.
If we don’t have her as a surrogate, I don’t know if I would feel comfortable having a person I didn’t know very well carrying my child. Would they be able to give it up? Would they be willing to work with me and my husband on their diet and what we want our child exposed to, even in-utero?

5. Adoption.
We’ve discussed this over and over. In fact I don’t think it’s possible to discuss this enough.
I have to be honest with myself, even if I don’t like the answer. I think I would be perfectly alright with adoption, but I just don’t know. I don’t see any reason why I wouldn’t want to adopt, but I HAVE to be 100% sure about it before I adopt a child. Otherwise, it’s not only bad for me, it’s completely unfair to the child.

I’ve finally decided to quit. Mostly because my fiancee who I will be moving in with in October is a non-smoker, but also.. because I’m simply tired of it.

I think my major hurdle will be my mother. I realize now the only reason I started smoking was to make her mad, and that every time I’ve tried to quit in the past, it was her constant nagging and comments about it that brought me back to it.
It’s childish, I know. I’m 25 for goodness sake, it’s time to quit rebellion and grow up.

Unfortunately, I know I also can’t talk to her about it. I can’t ask her nicely to just not mention my smoking, or that I’ve quit (or that I’m going to quit)
If I do, it’ll instantly turn into a Jewish Mother Guilt Trip.

I need to do this for ME. I need to do it because I want to be a better smelling, healthier person who has more money.

I, like a previous 43thinger stated, love the thought of becoming a Knight.
I know it’s practically impossible, but the world needs a few people who are willing to dream that impossible dream.
“Perhaps true madness is seeing the world as it is, rather than how it should be.”