About a year ago, my wife shot a film with her iPhone on my birthday party. I was drunk, embarrassingly drunk. I didn’t like myself in the film. I was being an arse. I kept on drinking, and normally I get drunk once a month.
The problem is, I can’t afford losing time being hung over on Sundays. I work two Saturdays a month, so time is valuable. Besides, I don’t even like it. Yes, the first three drinks and the next three, but afterwards it is down hill stupid binge drinking.
I don’t want to regret things. There were too many things I regretted.
I haven’t drunk a sip for three weeks now. I am not smoking and giving up coffee is next.
I am far more relaxed and balanced. There is more good energy.
When I’m 42, I probably will be drinking, but at least I know how it is not too drink.
I have been drinking for 25 years, and too be honest I never knew when too stop. I am one of those who go on and on. That is no longer a part of me. If I find myself back like that next year, I will quit drinking for good. I hope I will be able to enjoy a glass of wine, some great cocktails without getting into the ‘more more more’ modus.
It’s hard to admit you have a problem. Even here, it’s hard to admit that I can’t drink, because I behave weird and stupid sometimes. Not always, just sometimes, but that is too often. It’s amazing how much effort and energy I spent denying this. Of course, I wasn’t the one who drank every day. No, but there were times I couldn’t stop, were I had to, and I didn’t. Something is controlling you and for me that is an addiction, even if it shows its ugly face once a month.
I am sure this is normal for most people, it was normal for me. Now, I feel that life is precious and there are so many things to do. I don’t have time to waste.