Jellodream

I don’t know whether this will be my main goal in life for this year, or if I am going to do this half-assed.

But I think I should make an effort. It’s been two years since I’ve had a date and one year since I’ve been laid.

I am very lonely.

Currently I’m reading Love in 90 Days. I work in a MacBookstore, so I get to borrow books. I plan to read it once quickly, then re-read it and do the assignments/excercises.

I do believe that if someone is embarking on a quest for personal growth or change, then assignments/excercises are beneficial for progressing towards the goal. This is true whether you are working on a self-help program or are under the guidance of a counselor/therapist.

MacBookstore employees can only borrow books for a limited time, so I have to decide later whether to buy the book.

Chapter 2 is called Breaking the Deadly Dating Patterns. The author mentions that a lot of women have a combination of DDPs. One that is clearly mine is called The Hermit. All of my life I have had social phobic tendencies. In my childhood and teens I was extremely shy and had no friends. I still don’t make friends easily. My sister thinks I have Aspberger’s Syndrome.

In Chapter 1, the author tells you to join a social (or social-political) group or take a class so that you can meet others outside of work. But my personal interests/passions don’t seem to attract a lot of hetero men or are not really social. I am interested in Wicca/Magick/Spells, Crystal Healing, Astrology, Taoism/Chi Gong, Sacred Rituals in Asia, Mythology, Gay Rights/Gay Marriage :), Human Rights (especially China/Tibet/Burma), Society for Creative Anachronism/Renaissance Faire, etc. What to do? I want to be true to myself but I want to meet men on a regular basis.

I also would like to learn/improve my MS Word (and other common office programs)skills, photography, blog design, blogging/writing, documentary shorts, etc. But how social would classes in these subjects be? What if nobody talks to me and everybody just hurries home after class?

After I finish Love in 90 Days, I’ll read the book by that Millionaire Matchmaker lady. I don’t believe that a single book on a particular subject to be the sole bible.

Well, I completed this some time ago. The minute details escape me. And I accomplished it in bits and pieces. So in retelling how I did this, I am collapsing time.

In my twenties I began culling recipes from newspaper/magazine clippings and from free brochures/flyers. But for the past several years I’ve been collecting them mainly from the internet. Sometimes I photocopy a recipe from a cookbook.

Getting recipes from the internet has a lot of advantages. One can just look in one’s refrigerator and pantry and see which ingredients one is drowning in or is about to go bad. Two essential foods that one wants to consume can be chosen and entered in as keywords. A list of traditional and popular recipes that use those ingredients appears that one can choose from. This is better than buying several cookbooks that don’t help you combine and consume what you have on hand.

Also, I’ve started to get interested in collecting spells (and lists and addresses of astrologers, metaphysical/New Age stores, etc.) a few years ago. Now, magick spells are not the same as mundane recipes, but magical ritual has to be organized and easily manifested. Practical magic. Sometimes spells resemble recipes. I learned that many contemporary witches keep grimoires .

So I was amassing an unwieldy pile of paper. It was time for control.

One day I was wandering through the aisles of an Office Depot. I didn’t have a shopping list. Nor did I even come into the store with a mission to organize my recipes. But when I was looking at their collection of loose-leaf binders, it occured to me a binder would be an excellent format to keep my recipes. Almost all of the recipes I’ve collected are on sheets of paper that are in a standard 8”x 11” format. I decided to buy one of the orange ones. Orange is an appetizing color.

Like I said before in a previous entry, I find it easier to make changes and/or begin a new habit/start a project during the last quarter of the waning moon. So I’m feeling quite optimistic about sticking to the daily habit of taking supplements and vitamins this time. I’ve collected several different types of supplements. I’ve done some research on herbal medicine. I have fish oil and evening primrose capsules. I have glucosamine-chondrotin (sp?) tablets. I also have another type of supplement but I forgot what it was because I’m not home right now so I can’t check my medicine shelf.

Right now I’m taking fish oil capsules.