Jinni

i really dislike a person i have to see everyday. and as i consider him an idiot and a complete moron i am rather a nasty person in return. although i got a lot reasons to justify my actions none of them are really good enough. i work with the guy and hating him is wrong and making his life a bed of live coals to walk on is ruining my life to. i got to get over this. easier said then done. but its important that i do it,2 rise above all this and become a better person. first, god, what comes first?

I don’t know how much time a person should devote to playing if they don’t got a lot of talent. I go through ruts and i don’t know the meaning of achiving goals in guitar cuz there are so many routes to go. Last week i played 4 some ppl, why cuz the they asked me to. i fucked up real bad and swore never 2 play again. at least in front of ppl. but then i tell myself i ain’t the rock * so what the hell am i trying 2 do and impress them. i finally figured that i’ll play cuz i love it not 4 any one even some really hot guy, esp. a really hot guy :D.

I feel a little more confident in dancing. i dance going down the steps or when i’m stirring something in the kitchen. but this is when everything is quiet and i’m all alone. i gotta force myself to relax and just be natural around friends when hanging out or going to a concert. i think i care too much about what others think. gotta lose that first.