Joli_Bele

i stumbled across this project while surfing the net, and would like to build a wooden kayak, perhaps a tandem one.

i don’t want to just wait for things to come to me and happen, i don’t want to just wait to learn to accept and like my job. i don’t want to just wait and see whats going to happen, i want to jump up and live my life the way i envision it everyday in my head.

and i was reminded of this a couple of days ago by my dad- when he was talking about my relatives. they are all poor- but happy people. and it clicked i was not meant to have a high paying position in my life- i will never be happy with that.

in my life i want:::
to be happy! i want a husband, and i want to be sexy for him- and keep him satisfied, and learn how to please him. i don’t know if i want kids- but if i do have them- i want to be a stay at home mom or work part time. i want my kids (if i have them) to know i will always be there. i want some freedom first though- if i do decide to have kids. i want to try out other jobs- maybe not high paying jobs- maybe pay not so much over minimum wage but that make me happy.

my life is too short to be stressed out over a job i dislike and am only satisfied w/every other thursday. i am more than a job. i want to live somewhere else- away from where i grew up. away from the places and things and people that just stare back at you like a pile of post-it notes that should have been tossed out a long time ago. i need a new life. i want the one i see in my head for myself. i want that one.

ok so about a week ago i actually attempted to make some tamales. but not just any tamales- apple tamales. it was a dessert recipe i found, its like apple pie but with masa and a honey drizzle. the whole tamale process- really intimidated me- i’m not much of a cook- more of what you might call domestically challenged. but it honestly wasn’t that bad. it took awhile- no lie! but i will do it again.

my boyfriend, expert tamale critic, informed me that my apple tamales were good & different, but needed more texture aka: to soggy. which i agree- i think i’ll steam them for at least an hour longer next time.