Kiddokat

Tori is my little girl. She’s 5 years old and I love her more than anything in the world! She’s cute & SO smart…she’s got the coolest way of thinking things through and makes me laugh at least 5 times a day. BUT she refuses to play by herself. She is afraid of her room & the hallway leading to her room (which by the way is also the way to the bathroom…we’re having scary monster issues)...so Mommy or Daddy have to walk her to her bedroom & bathroom EVERYDAY. She will not play by herself, she constantly wants me to play with her and I do for a little while but I just cannot do it all the time…and I wonder, is that wrong? If I make her play by herself she cries and whines and says, “You ruined my life”...and I get scared she’s going to have psychological issues…(I know…I need to grow a backbone!)...but she’s ALWAYS been a high maintenance kid , from the day she was born she has required almost constant attention. If I tell her to go play and entertain herself she just stands by me & talks nonstop…I’m at a loss, but I’m ready to take a strong stance and become a better mom. I need to be more consistent and do what I say and say what I mean. I’m a great mom actually…I love her, she gets lots of attention but there are days when I feel like I’m such a bad mom. Because she bugs me to play with her all the time, it makes me not want to play with her AT ALL because no matter how long I play with her its not enough. She’s the most well behaved child you will find outside the home, but at home she’s like a little maniac! She yells & back talks…when I reprimand her for that she says its my fault & she hates her life….!!!!!!!! SHE’S 5!!!!!!! (God only knows what I have to look forward to in the teen years!) I think what I have to do is be stronger & more strict (even though my husband and I already are pretty strict I think)...my problem is…I don’t know what the right thing to do is…I really don’t. Maybe becoming a better mom is figuring that out.

I don’t know why, but I ALWAYS look at the clock when its 1:11 or 11:11. I wish I knew why because its become so much more than a coiincidence….so strange!