slh

The choice is between

- Tae Kwon Do: nice people, fridays are off (so I can go tricking), the people are cool, but it’s kinda expensive…

- Shaolin Kung Fu: I learn tricks, it’s not that expensive, it’s REALLY close to where I live, no class on friday, but I’ve only seen or heard about little kids going there… ~‘

- Wushu: I learn tricks, I get a MAJOR student discount, so it’s really cheap, I learn stickfighting as well, it’s gracious, a good old friend (and some other people I know from high school) trains there too, the trainingspace is where another friend goes to school. Downside is that you learn to do everything with your left and there’s a class on fridays.

Wushu clearly wins, but I have to make sure the old friend doesn’t mind. We talked a couple of days ago and he showed me some stuff, we ‘trained’ together for fun. It was nice. :)
We used to be the best of friends, but then I did some stupid, stupid things and the friendship suffered. So we let it water and didn’t really talk a lot to each other anymore. I still regret it to this day.
Even if he’s okay with me doing Wushu, the ball would still be in his court. I don’t dare to hope for things to go back to the way they were, but I do hope that we’ll become good friends again, eventually.

I’m finally getting some help. I’ve been using ritalin for almost two weeks now (or at least I was supposed to be… I forget to take them). I’m also getting help with planning and organizing (using a planner, timemanagement).

I like that I’m finally getting somewhere and something is being done about it, but at the same time I’m not really sure how to handle this. I’ve told some friends, but what do I say when they ask what I’m doing/what I did when I’m working on assignments my therapist gave me? ...

Anoher realization: I am a person that very much lives in the moment.

I have never really been able to get motivated for things that were/are too far in the future. Working on school now, so I can have a nicer job later? I can’t even imagine myself having a job other than the one I currently have as a cassière. But, I don’t really mind this job; I kinda like it in fact.

Don’t get me wrong: I have ambitions and dreams and goals (heh, plenty of goals!), otherwise I wouldn’t even be here. I just don’t see myself becoming or doing them just yet. I have other things to focus on and to work on before I move on to developing my career.

I still don’t even know in what kind direction I want that career to be! Because I simply can’t picture myself that far in the future. I’m more into just doing my thing, figuring out where my talents and passions are and working on my own projects on my own; without having to deal with annoying project partners I clash with.

And then, at my own pace, although that can be far too slow sometimes, I will eventually get exactly where I want to be. I would like that much better this feeling: like I’m being pushed and forced and thrown into one direction, along with the main stream and the rapids.

Seriously considering to go quitsies on school.