I'm doing 17 things
In the last couple weeks I had a feeling my relationship is falling apart. My boyfriend’s past really bothers me. His brief encounters with women and all of his short-term relationships do not mirror the romantical attachments I had in my life. He can’t change his past and neither can I.
I can live with the fact that there were other women before me, but I can’t deal with the circumstances that he had a woman move in with him after he knew her for about a week while he did not even think of moving in with me after a long time, not even when I was expecting his child.
Am I just jealous?
Lilura's Life List
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1. Beat my depression
2 entries . 5 cheers1,970 people -
2. Never fall back into old habits
23 cheers1 person -
3. Channel my inner Marilyn Monroe
2 entries . 22 cheers1 person -
4. Believe that everything is always getting better
2 entries . 15 cheers1 person -
5. Have a secret project
1 entry . 19 cheers1 person -
6. Go out by myself
1 entry . 39 cheers4 people -
7. Flirt with someone entirely inappropriate
14 cheers0 people -
8. When someone hugs me, let them be the first to let go.
14 cheers3 people -
9. Get my dresses tailored
5 cheers1 person -
10. Tell someone cute “You’re cute”
7 cheers1 person -
11. Take a nap with my head at the other end of the bed
3 cheers1 person -
12. hula hoop
4 cheers31 people -
13. Have a movie moment
15 cheers12 people -
14. Enjoy the moment of anticipation just before the kiss
1 entry . 14 cheers1 person -
15. Fall in love one day
3 entries . 8 cheers6 people -
16. Find my soulmate
3 entries . 20 cheers3,219 people -
17. Remember 100 special moments which make my life worth while
8 entries . 21 cheers2 people
How I did it
It made me
willing and able 
How I did it: Well, how can I begin? I suppose every beginning is difficult. Usually the problem is that you don't know how to keep it going. What happens after you begin, start something new? People may encourage you to do things, maybe you even embolden yourself to try something but how can you pursue? Find out what you wanna do with your life. Take small steps and ask yourself what it is that drives you and which things truly make you happy. Steps b… Read how I did it…
It made me
knowing
How I did it: At first I have to admit that this is not as easy as it looks. If it looks easy anyway. The hardest part is to let go, to forgive but not to forget. I guess you learn a lesson with everything you go through in life, aslong as you can carry on. When you finitely set your mind on forgiveness your life will change for the better. It will free you from all this accrued rage and negative mindset, and your life, as you knew it, will not exist a… Read how I did it…
It made me
oh so gorgeous
How I did it: Can you recall this extraordinary painting by Sandro Botticelli named The Birth of Venus? It pictures the lustrous beauty of the goddess Venus. After emerging from the sea, as a grown woman in full bloom, with spume still sweeping under the shell she is standing on, her long wreath of strawberry blond hair covers her bareness and clings to her pale, almost translucent skin. She is depicted completely naked with a graceful smile upon her … Read how I did it…
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Recent entries
This year has been a tough one for me. I lost my job, my flat, some of my friends. But what hurt me the most was that my mother passed away this year. We were enormously close and I took care of her when she became ill. She died almost 8 months ago and I still miss her tremendously. I know I will miss her for the rest of my life.
Shortly after her passing, my boyfriend and I found out I was pregnant. I felt so excited; it is so beautiful to find out there is another heart beating inside of you. I was so overwhelmed, so curious about my pregnancy… I lost it after only 8 weeks.
I feel devastated but I refuse to let this bring me down again. One night I read the PostSecret site. There was one amazing postcard which read “dear Mom, your life made me strong, your passing made me stronger & I’m living my life for the both of us”. I wanna feel the same way, too. One day.
