My best friend is leaving this Thursday to join the Army, I am very happy for her making this decision to better her life, but I am very sad as well, We have been friends for over 16 years, since we were kids, I am also concerned about the military due to the war, I am happy but concerned for her safety, I have been avoiding the goodbye for a week know,I am just no good at them, but I have wrote her a letter expressing my feelings and I plan on seeing her today before she goes…..
My goal is to meditate as much as I can, or find what inspires me, such as a song, a passage, or something someone has said that is positive, Reconnect with my self so I won’t lose myself
What is the meaning of profound, what does it really mean, I found this to be one of the definition that I choose to go by for myself,
“Penetrating beyond what is superficial or obvious: a profound insight.” I give up on most things that are superficial in this world, I now focus my energy on the things that I can not see, those things which are unseen are eternal, everlasting, I give way from all the things to focus on my goals on being a better person, to live a life of service to help others, no matter what the cause, no matter what I receive or don’t receive in return, I am completely gone, I am no more of this world, I live here, but I am not of here, I will kill the flesh that I live in to save my soul, from destruction.
No need to explain, I have the Eye of the Tiger now
I feel in order to improve your mind, you have to start with your body too…Sometimes when we don’t feel good physically it can affect us mentally, I have been off my dieting plan for a couple of years now, and I feel like it too, My goal is to eventually lose weight, but first I want to control my eating habits and what I intake and then start from there…..Then start a exercise program…
I missed out on to many good opportunities, by putting things off…I need to push myself to do things even when I don’t feel like it….
I have opted to stay single for the most part of my life, I have always felt there are some things you need to do before you settle down with your significant other if you choose so…I enjoy being alone, but I don’t want to be lonely, I want to spend my life making small changes in and around my community, I want to be needed in a profound way, To me it’s no need to sacrifice love or meeting that special someone just for a mediocre existence,I believe I have a purpose in life and it is to help the less fortunate, be their advocate, speak for those who have no voice…
My dad always said, people spend more time looking at the problem instead of look for a solution. I tend to worry a lot about the direction that my life is going in and the things that I should have done, but I never stopped to try to find a solution to this until now…I am going to milk these 43 things well 7 now until I complete them, My dad also said in Life there is always a solution to every problem, we just have to look hard enough..
Like I stated in the entry before this, Missed out on the opportunity to get free training for CNA….
Well there are plenty of schools especially community colleges that offer the CNA program for a little over 1,000 dollars, but also some hospitals/nursing homes offer these programs for free and than employment after wards, I missed out on the opportunity at the local hospital in my area, because of my laziness and procrastination, but now I am willing to shuffle the bucks to make this happen, Don’t put off tommorrow, what you can do today…Huge Mistake.
I want to find a flexible job that will allow me to have enough money to pay my monthly expenses, I am aware of sacrificing carnal pleasures to make this happen…I have a low car payment, insurance, no credit card bills, and other maintenance, I live home so I don’t have a large amount of rent. I want to go to school for at least 2 years to earn an associates degree in Health Care Administration, or train to be a Physician assistant after I get a certificate to become a Certified Nursing Assistant
It is very hard to achieve goals, when you have an attitude that you will never amount to any thing. I realize that in order to change my life I have to change my attitude. There is a saying the late Ghandi said ” “Be the change that you want to see in the World”, I can’t make any changes until I start with my self.
I would love to scribble down 43 goals,but I am learning slow and steady works better for me, The last time I was here I made so many goals I became overwhelmed and just gave up on all of them, Now I have returned to achieve these few goals than begin to add more…I have been so tired lately low energy, negative thoughts and just simply hopeless, but now I am ready to do things I have never done, to get things I have never had….Wish me Luck, I really need it.