QTmandy

so i’m totally in love with my bf, but thinking back over the past 2 and a half years together, i’m not sure if he truly truly loves me, he gives me the feeling that we are temporary and that he will want someone new once he reaches a new chapter in his life. i want to be that one person he will love forever but i know its naive to think like that as i’m still young and yet to experience other loves. i just want to mean as much to him as he does to me… i’ve been waiting a long time for it to happen, i don’t know if it ever will..

Yes i’m too much of a worrier, not a warrior, but a worrier and a big one. I think waaay too much than i should. I think i’ve gotten worse over the past year as well, especially after i started suffering from anxiety attacks during exams last year, it’s seeped out from just exams into education as a whole and now consuming my day to day life. It’s probably not as bad as i’m making it sound but i just hate that feeling.

it’s not about having less stress in life, because daily stresses will always be there but just learning to cope with it, there’s no point worrying about something you can’t change, and if you can change it then change it! just need to take a breath and realise that i’m in control.

why is it so difficult to find a hobby? i feel like you have to be good at something to be able to make an effort towards that hobby. i spend more time looking for something to do than actually doing it, to be honest i don’t think i really know what a hobby is, as all i seem to think of is sports or playing instruments… is watching tv a hobby? cuz i’m really good at that! i want a hobby where i can be creative, just can’t think of anything interesting? :S hmmm