I raised my sons the best that I could after each of my marriages failed. What hurts now is that they don’t really know me as a healthy soul, since I was depressed or manic or frantic and struggling a lot of their young lives. They saw me complete my BS and recover after divorces, but I made such bad choices with men that I know they suffered. I didn’t know how to parent teenage boys alone, and as a single mother I learned quickly that their adoring relationship with me would end at 15. I love them more than they will ever know and I am trying so hard to be an adult with my adult kids who are now struggling with their own relationships. 20 and 30. I am even a grandma since 1998 and have no relationship at all with my grandchild and a new one who is possibly mine.