Scarryhat

Two british shorthair kittens on their way = will be with us at end of June. I can’t wait!

So it just hasn’t worked out. I guess not everything does. I’ve stuck at it determined that it was my fault I was miserable and really tried to make the best of it. But I knew almost day 1 that it wasn’t the job for me. It’s less money and further to travel than the old job so it made it really hard to come to terms with the fact that I was not ever going to enjoy it – I had really thought I would get more out of it so that those things didn’t matter.

Anyway, I spent quite a while trying – I’m really not used to things not working out as I usually get through most things with a bit a determination and hard work – then I started bitching.

At first the bitching was good – I was realising that it just wasn’t for me rather than I was a failure. But then it got a bit much, I looked at it from every angle (another habit of mine – usually applied in a positive way) and broke down exactly why I didn’t like it. Every day I would think of more reasons why it wasn’t working.

I became really negative. It started to change my personality (crazy huh?) I became withdrawn and unsociable – realising that no-one would want to sit through hours of me ranting about my job but somehow unable to concentrate on anything else.

Finally, I did something about it. I updated my CV (really easy given I only recently applied for jobs) and called a couple of people I knew who may be looking for people to hire – and they were! And they were happy to hear from me. That in itself – after months of feeling really isolated (at work and because I had gotten so negative in my social life too) – was a real boost. I’m interviewing again and looking at my options but already I feel more in control and more positive.

So – it’s not over yet and I don’t want to jinx it but – this whole experience has been good in the long run. Perhaps knowing what you really don’t like (by experiencing it first hand) helps you realise what you really do want and helps you know what to look for.

Often you take things for granted but you never know until they are no longer there – but having known better times you know that it is out there.

Maybe get someone to help – needs to be someone with patience but someone with a more objective eye could really help work out what you really don’t need to keep.

Pack clothes away for a specified period – say in a suitcase under the bed – and if you don’t find yourself going to dig them out before the time is up take the bag/box straight to the charity shop – don’t open it up again, that’s a fatal error!

Sort your clothes into piles – (1) stuff that is fine but that you never wear (even if you think you really like it you obviously don’t if you are not wearing them!); (2) stuff that is just old or worn – is that what you deserve to go round in?; (3) stuff that doesn’t really fit – it may kind of fit but let’s face it if you have this as a goal too much stuff is driving you crazy and you can definitely do better – why sell yourself short/too baggy/too tight?; (4) stuff that you really do love – memories etc; (5) stuff you actually like and wear (I mean really wear, every week or if it is formal stuff – whenever there is a formal).

So take piles (1), (2) and (3) to the charity shop, then look at (4) – really? are you sure that you want to carry that stuff around with you for the rest of your life? Be brave. Keep say 5 things max.(5) How big is this pile? Too big? half it. Then half it again. Repeat until it actually fits in the cupboard.

And when you go shopping – remember the pain of the cull and only buy fabulous things!