SocialFiction

I’ve never been fired before, but I often get tired of playing the part of the upstanding, responscible member of society. Just like in that episode of Seinfeld where George wants to get fired from the yankees, so he walks around the office eating messy foods in an original unform of Babe Ruth’s. I just hope there’s some time in my life when I have a job lined up in 2 months or so, so that I have the time to get a crappy job that I don’t care about just so I can get fired for blatant negligence just before my real job begins. Suppose I get to work for some fast food joint for a month and then one day: “Sorry boss, I kinda dropped the cash register into the deep fryer while filling the fry bin with chocolate milkshake. Guess I should leave and never come back, shouldn’t I?” Now that sounds like fun, but only once.

So what would you do with your life if you won the lottery and could dictate your own lifestyle without worry of financial obligations? I know what I would do. I would travel the country, going from university to university collecting undergrad degrees like they were comic books. I already have one in Communication & Culture and will soon have a second in Telecommunications. From here I would probabaly go for Philosophy, then Psychology, then maybe History or Sociology. Or at least that would be the plan if I had unlimited funds, but I don’t.

So what’s the next best way to stay in school forever? I figure the next best thing is to start in on Grad school with the ultimate aim of achieving a PHD, publish a few books, and of course teach as a professor in the meantime. I miss the discussions about film and social movements from my CMCL days so I will most likely be seeking admission into graduate program in Communication theory.

Here’s where I encounter my problem. Disertations are long, and I have been known to have a short attention span. I no longer believe that to be my problem so much as the question of what will be my focus. Media Theory? Production and Technique? Film Interpretation and Dissection? Postmodern thought in media? I find all these topics interesting, but no one topic sticks out as more so than the others. If only there was an easier way to force myself to choose…

Seeing this goal as part of my 43 things might prompt a misunderstanding about my intentions. I do not want to imply that I have some sort of anger towards Zach Braff or that I think he is untalented as an actor. That is simply not the case. I love Scrubs and I think the way he portrays JD is perfect and adds a lot to what makes the show hilarious. The problem, as I see it, began when I saw Garden State. Parts of that film are hilarious, and he thoroughly proved himself as a very able and talented writer of comedy. But I don’t think that comedy was his main intention with writing that movie. There are so many parts of that movie that seem written solely to make women say “AAAWWWWWWWWEE”. That’s not to mention the soundtrack, MY GOD, the soundtrack! These elements ruined the movie for me, and it looks like they might ruin his career. Last Kiss is a strong and obvious case in point for my argument. This marks the beginning of his being typecast as a possibly bumbling romantic lead that can sell comedy well. This set’s him on the track of becoming pigeon-holed into a short career of 2 or 3 forgetable movies playing this predictable stock character before he quickly fades into obscurity and his career disapears into mediocracy. I don’t want this to happen. I want him to turn down those stock roles in romantic comedies no matter hw many zeros are on the paycheck. I want him to write more, and focus on comedy, not bland sentimentality. Someone needs to be there to tell him “NO”, to save him from himself, and to show him how to play to his strengths. I think he could be destined for comedic greatness, so long as someone is there to punch him in the face every time he considers a role that will help him prove me wrong.