Soxten

So i’ve really liked this guy for years, and he’s a really nice boy, so everyone like him. Not in the same way as I do… But he’s got so many friends, everywhere, so you can’t really be alone with him without someone saying “Oh! Are you here!? How nice, I’ll just join you then!”...

Now I have the chance… We’re going to the same party in two weeks, and he sent me a textmessage, “I miss you, I can’t wait to see you”.

And guess what. I fall for another guy. Just like that. I really hete myself. A couple of years, for this one day when i felt that I get high everytime this other guy talks to me. And that i don’t get so excited when the one i loved calls me, anymore.

And it’s not like i have a chance on the new guy. He’s like superhot, and he is veeeeeeeery popular. With the girls.

Why oh why!? And I don’t know what to do. Maybe wait until the party and see if i feel better after hanging out with him. But it’s winter prom on wednesday. And i’d like to dance with the new guy… But I’d feel terrible flirting with him if the other guy doesn’t know that i don’t love him anymore.

Oh lord help me.

I sing in a chorus because i love singing… But i don’t like the group thing :P I might sound like an ego, but i don’t like to sing like backup. I sing in a band too, but we’ve only played for some months, so it doeasn’t really count.

It’s not a need of mine to get famous, but i’d like to be approved as a singer. My friends and my teacher are telling me that i’m a good singer, but when i was younger somebody told me that i sang terrible, so it’s kind of a trauma of mine to get over… And you know, friends might just say so to be nice…

So what i’m saying is that i need to hear from people i don’t know that i sing well… I know it sounds like i just want attention, but well, what i said is true…

I’ve written poems, songs and short stories. I can’t draw, but somehow i’m gonna find a way to make someone watch at my work and say “wow, that’s wonderful!”