I'm doing 16 things
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about not achieving certain goals… how some seem to resurface year after year…. like weight loss for one… certainly there is something fundamentally wrong.
I discovered in 2009 that I had a quietly lingering belief that I COULD NOT LOSE THE WEIGHT I WANTED TO LOSE. It was hidden way under many layers as I peeled back the onion! I was shocked to discover that for as positive as I was and as much “I can do anything” attitude I possessed… that belief was still present!
But since I made that discovery, I really haven’t done anything other than acknowledge it. How cerebral of me… how can I remedy this faulty belief system? If I know that it’s a false belief, what if anything, have I done anything to change my experiences with weight loss? ... ... chirp ... chirp Do I hear crickets?
What if I could hire myself?
When you are hired to do a job, you do the job you’ve been hired to do… that’s having professional integrity. What if I looked at running my life as a “business” and applied that professional integrity to my personal growth?? What?? Yes. What if I did that…
Integrity- consistency of actions, values, methods, measures, principles, expectations and outcome
Well, where is there a lack of consistency? Between my actions and values? .... between my actions and expected outcomes… between my values and principles??? Just in writing this out and brainstorming, I have discovered one…
Example #1: I ate peanut m&m’s last night… my actions and my expected outcome didn’t line up… I expect to lose weight… hmmmmm ….
Example #2: I value moderation instead of deprivation… But I was already over my calories for the day… inconsistency between my method and my expected outcome again…. and a little value clash there are well…
I really am starting to see where my issues are:
I have unreasonable expectations for the outcome I desire based on my methods, and conflicting values. I value leisure and indulgence on a scale much higher than I can have based on the tight, toned, hot body that I so badly want…. if I valued that toned body more, I would have no problem holding myself to the consistency that goes along with it… not indulging in chocolate and lounging when I could be walking.
You know… that quiet underlying belief is kind of true… I can’t lose the weight because my actions and values and principles and desired results are out of line completely! Give someone a goal that is unattainable and watch how demotivated they become!
What if I were a “fairer” boss?
Can one change his or her values? I don’t believe so. I think this is why some people fail on diets. I know this woman who has the body I want. She allows herself ONE... that’s right ONE splurge a year… a slice of pizza in the summer when she goes to the beach. One slice of pizza ALL YEAR?! Only lean proteins and veggies and whole grains otherwise. THAT’S IT. She has a gorgeous body…. is it worth it?? To me… NO WAY. So guess what… I’m not going to have that body.
Do I actually value that kind of body? Actually… no. If not for magazines and movie stars, I likely would not even be stressing and obsessing over it I’m sure. But I do love exercising and hiking and biking and walking and running….!!! I value being active. It feels amazing! Now feeling amazing? That is something I value.
I don’t believe in elimination diets where you reject a certain food type all together…. or imbalance proteins over carbs… but portion control I think is OK… for me!
So, if I can come to terms with my expected results… just fitter… not model status… and align that with the action… moderate exercise I enjoy with calorie/portion control… I think I’ll be closer…
Because to me…. life is too short to live without chocolate… and life is too short to “live” at the gym : )
Give someone (myself) unreasonable goals and watch how quickly the motivation flies out the window… I will NEVER achieve that so I am done trying…. give someone a reasonable goal to work towards and watch the motivation level rise.
It’s time to give myself some fair quotas!!!! : )
