Life has a way of working against you at times…sometimes often. I am about to fail at completing this goal once again. It just does not seem fair. After all these years we were not able to keep one promise to ourselves for our children. I believed in him here at the end only to be manipulated one last time. In doing so he has cost me a tremendous amount of money fighting over the house my kids and I now live. I was, unlike most that enter into divorce, trying to be decent and kind and understanding…for what…just to be taken in one last time…those closest to me warned me but I did not listen…now I wait as we are about to enter into a fight of a lifetime…because I am not backing down now…For whatever reason I loved this man and hoped even though I knew there was another for what ends up being 13 years and that is who is with now…I could still love and care…I know it is crazy; but through it all I could only see what I thought was good and to be how I would want to be treated by him and others…What a fool I have been. Now I look to my inner strength; fortitude…to find my way through to the end that is coming…I do not know when but it is…not sure how I am going to keep it all together; but I will find away…I will come out standing on my own two feet and I just know one day my kids will see I was strong and confident and that everything I have ever done and will do has and will have been for them and those I love.
No more goals on this one…I will let it fall where it falls from here on out and hopefully one day very soon will have ended.
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