ac1981

The living room is done, as is the office and dining room. I am about 75% on the kitchen. Have not even started on the Master Bedroom or (future)Nursery. The bathroom is also near completion, although it’s never too bad to begin with. Just maintainance… I have about two or three loads of laundry to finish. I think I have probably done about ten in the last five days!! I am feeling good. Now if I can just keep it this way!

With three dogs (one is a St Bernard) in my home, it can be difficult to keep everything neat all the time. I do, however, place too much blame on the dogs!! I am a bit lazy when it comes to housework.

I would like to get my home to a state where I can have an unexpected guest show up and not feel totally embarressed by my untidy house!

As it stands, if I am having company over, I have to clean for three to four hours to get everything to what I feel is “presentable.”

My biggest obstacles are:

1. Laundry—I do not have a laundry room. Instead there is a closet where the washer/dryer is. This is in the dining room and so outside of that closet door are PILES of laundry that need to be done.

2. Dishes—Hate them. I will let them pile up in the kitchen until I have nearly none left.

3. Dogs—Muddy floors. My three dogs (and cat) use a doggy door, so when it rains, my white tile floors in the Dining Room and Kitchen & Hardwoods in the rest of the house are covered in muddy paw prints! I feel like every time I sweep & mop, it rains within a day or two and I gotta do it all over again. So, I just don’t do it very often!

So, after three stillbirths and one early miscarriage, I am wondering if I am not meant to have a child born of my own body. I have come to the place in my heart where it is more important to be a mother than to have a baby. By that, I mean to parent a child, rather than to conceive one. It (parenting) is what I feel in my heart I was meant to do, just maybe not in the way most people come about the situation.

Update My husband and I found out that we were again pregnant in February 2009. Unfortunately, we had another loss, a miscarriage at 8 1/2 weeks.
Because of this, we have decided to move on. We are going to be foster parents & adopt a newborn!
Our first foster/adopt class is May 11 ~ only a week away