axolos

OMG, am I stuck! Two months went by and I did write something like a page and a half… such a misery! Wah! I am getting really angry about myself. And I really want to finish this as soon as possible… I just have to sit down and do it… why am I so weak in doing this?

After one month of full-time work, I am looking back and can say that this is really something, I needed to experience… and I am not at the end of experiencing it. Full-time work is a part of our societal construct and I am still unsure whether I like it or not. :)
For me, I suppose it largely depends on the job I do. There has to be a feeling of enjoying the work due to its impact on the lives of others… I have a feeling that I am not really happy when working for for-profit companies. The money isn’t what I complain about… it is the vision. I do not like when people lose perspective and forget why they do what they do… when the fisher loses his joy of fishing and does it only because of the money, when the consultant loses his joy of helping others and does it because the money, when teachers lose the joy of transmitting their knowledge and do it mechanically without thinking about it… I do not like that and surely I feel like there is a lot of this happening around.
So – when regarding myself – do I feel like this job contributes to my needs and visions? Well, needs: yes. Visions: partially. Which makes it above average…
Getting a full-time job is not a problem. Getting the right one is. :)

I haven’t been brought up in a religious way. But that is not what I am currently looking for. I want to find my spirituality. I believe that maybe I actually do many things with a lot of spiritual meaning behind them, however I do not define these things as spiritual.

Btw, I have bought myself a book, which I want to use as a reflection when on this journey. It’s The Soul’s Religion from Thomas Moore, and so far, I really like it. He connects several religional concepts and also the book is structured in a very good way.